Today, many people do not know their neighbours in large cities. What problems does this cause? What can be done about this?

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In the modern age, many
people
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do not know who lives next to them in the largest cities because
people
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work
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very bury and
this
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essay will give the solution that spending more
time
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on their
life
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. There are many problems that
people
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argue that
people
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are
work
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-hard to
work
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every day. Many families have many activities that they
work
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and do
such
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as housework or
work
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to raise money.
People
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's
life
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is an example,
people
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get up early to prepare for their
work
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and their family like making breakfast or riding their children to school and after
work
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, they will go home and spend more
time
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with family. So it is difficult for many
people
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to meet their
neighbours
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. They
work
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at different times and coming across to meet neighbourhoods outside the house to say "hello" is difficult. If many families had
time
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, they would gather their
neighbours
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in the residence area.
However
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, a solution can be found in
people
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's lives when they can arrange their times. They need to spend more
time
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on
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in
show examples
their
life
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and have
time
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to relax or gather with their
neighbours
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to reduce stress in their
work
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.
People
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will be helped by their
neighbours
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when they have difficult problems in their house.
For instance
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,
people
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hang out for their
work
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and the
neighbours
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can protect their houses when there
are
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is
show examples
a problem
such
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as household fires or robbers stealing.
As a result
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,
people
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need to prepare suitable times to
work
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and their lives. Many families should spend more
time
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with their
neighbours
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to have more relatives. In conclusion, many
people
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need to communicate with their
neighbours
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to make a better
life
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.Today, many
people
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do not know their
neighbours
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in large cities. What problems does
this
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cause? What can be done about
this
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?
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Coherence and Cohesion
The essay lacks a clear progression of ideas and the sentences are disjointed, which affects the logical structure. To improve, create a clear outline before writing, using paragraphs effectively to separate different thoughts.
Coherence and Cohesion
The introduction and conclusion should clearly present the topic and summarise the main arguments. The introduction is too vague, and the conclusion just restates the prompt without offering a summary of main ideas.
Coherence and Cohesion
You must expand on the main points by using clear and relevant examples, offering explanations, and fully developing the ideas. Currently, the examples provided are too general and don't effectively support the arguments.
Task Achievement
The response to the task needs to be more fully extended and developed. The essay does not adequately address the specific problems caused by not knowing one's neighbours, nor does it provide concrete solutions. More detailed analysis and a wider range of vocabulary could significantly improve this aspect.
Task Achievement
The ideas presented are not fully elaborated and appear simplistic. To improve, offer more comprehensive ideas by delving deeper into the issues and potential solutions. Each paragraph should focus on one main idea and be fully explored before moving to the next.
Task Achievement
Specific examples are essential in supporting your points and demonstrating a clear understanding of the topic. Your essay lacks this specificity. For better task achievement, incorporate precise examples that strongly tie back to the points being made.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Community spirit
  • Isolation
  • Surveillance
  • Safety and security
  • Vulnerability
  • Support networks
  • Local gatherings
  • Foster
  • Social media platforms
  • Neighbourhood watch
  • Emergency situations
  • Natural disasters
  • Shared resources
  • Crime rates
What to do next:
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