IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the number of households in the US by their annual ’ income in 2007, 2011 and 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

The chart below shows the number of households in the US by their annual ’ income in 2007, 2011 and 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.
#households #income #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The bar graph provides information on the
quantity
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of
households
 in the USA by annual earnings in three different years, exactly in 2007, 2011 and 2015.
Overall
, a quite
big
Correct word choice
large
show examples
 number of
households
 in
US
Correct article usage
the US
show examples
 which earned 50,000 – 99,999, remained almost stable in these given years. Those, which earned money were 49,999 million or less, experienced considerable changes during these periods.
While
 the housekeeping’s incomes with 100,000 million or more were quite different
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
each year. In 2007, the majority of
households
 (around 30
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
) pocketed 100,000 or larger,
also
 about 50
millions
Fix the agreement mistake
million
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 of them had incomes starting 49,999 or below
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
. Slightly more than 20
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 earned 50,000-74,999,
whereas
 almost 15
millions
Fix the agreement mistake
million
show examples
 of USA
households
 got 75,000-99,999. After 4 years, 49,999 and less was earned by 30
millions
Fix the agreement mistake
million
show examples
 of them. The group, which proceeds
was
Change the verb form
were
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 100,000 or above, decreased faintly to around 28
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
.
While
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
quantity
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of
housekeepings
Fix the agreement mistake
housekeeping
show examples
within
Change preposition
with
show examples
 income from 50,000 to 74,999 remained constant, on the bottom of the list were the
households
 (less than 15
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
) with earnings between 75,000-99,999. In the
last
 year of the chart, the highest income was a group of over 30 million which made money 100,000
and
Correct word choice
or
show examples
 more.
A
Correct article usage
The
show examples
 number of
households
 with 74,999 or less money did not experience a significant change, and the lowest income group’s number rose steadily to exactly 15
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
.
Submitted by kama.star.00 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words households, millions with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • household distribution
  • income brackets
  • annual income
  • percentage change
  • trend analysis
  • income group
  • significant increase/decrease
  • steady growth/decline
  • fluctuations
  • compared to
  • in contrast
  • notably
  • median income
  • poverty line
  • economic factors
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