Fossil fuels, such as coal, oil and natural gas, are the main source for many countries. However, some nations are using alternative energy such as solar power and wind power. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#fuels #oil #gas #source #countries #nations #alternative #energy #power #wind #development

There has been a huge progress in different contexts of human evolution like technology, society, and economy. Coal, oil, and natural gas are the main

sources

of power for many countries.

However

, using these

sources

is problematic

due to

the damage caused by greenhouse gases.

Therefore

, some nations are using alternative

energy

such

as solar and wind power. In

this

essay, I will explain why using alternative

energy

is more beneficial for us and the advantages of these

sources

. Human activity, especially in the manufacturing and daily

energy

used in large populations like cities, is overloading our atmosphere with carbon dioxide and other global warming emissions, causing results in harmful and irreparable damage to the ecosystem, impacting more on the atmosphere.

In contrast

, most renewable

energy

sources

produce little to no global warming emissions. Strong winds, sunny skies, and fast-moving water can each provide a vast and constant

energy

supply, allowing us to reduce global warming emissions. Compared with fossil fuel technologies, which are typically mechanized and owned by only a few large companies, the renewable

energy

industry is more

labor intensive

Add a hyphen

labor-intensive

show examples

. Creating development and jobs in manufacturing, installation, and maintenance of solar panels, wind farms, and Hydroelectric plants. That means more jobs and economic growth compared with fossil fuels industries.

To sum up

, the advantages of the use of renewable

energy

have a significant impact on the positive benefits of caring for the environment.

Also

, the financial and career developments that

this

sector can bring to society

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

an impulse to raise the human vision of the future.

Making

Wrong verb form

This makes

show examples

us think about

Correct word choice

whether

show examples

the interests of a few companies define the future of our planet.

Submitted by Andrea Barreto on Wed Nov 08 2023

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task response

Ensure that you fully address the prompt question and maintain a clear position throughout the essay.

coherence and cohesion

The logical structure of the essay is well-maintained, but you could improve the use of transitions to enhance coherence.

lexical resource

The range of vocabulary used is impressive, but be mindful of using appropriate and precise terminology.

grammatical range

The grammar and sentence structure used are generally accurate, but watch out for subject-verb agreement and article usage errors.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

276 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

fossil fuels
coal
oil
natural gas
alternative energy
solar power
wind power
positive development
negative development
reduction
environmental impact
sustainable development
diversification
energy sources
initial high costs
reliance
weather conditions
limited availability
remote areas

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Fossil fuels, such as coal, oil and natural gas, are the main source for many countries. However, some nations are using alternative energy such as solar power and wind power. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Fully explain your ideas

The government should band smoking in all public places, even tough this would restrict some other people’s freedoms. Do you agree and disagree?

Some developed countries now have unemployment problems. Why do people still want to immigrate to these countries? Give reasons and specific examples to explain your answer.

In some countries, schools are open till late so that children can be looked after when parents are at work. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages.

The growing number of overweight people is putting a strain on the health care system. Some people think that the best way to deal with this problem is to introduce more physical education lessons in school curriculum. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

These days consumers are faced with an increasing amount of advertising from various companies. To what extent do you think consumers are influenced by advertising? What measures should be taken to protect them?