Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
It is argued that nowadays
people
have a myriad of choices
in their life. I agree with this
point of view because social and economic condition gives people
many options.
Firstly
, the structure of society has transformed in twenty centuries and it gives us many choices
. In the past, people
who were sociable and gregarious knew just their family and their acquaintances or their neighborhood
; Change the spelling
neighbourhood
however
, now they have plenty of options in communication which is challenging to prioritize and choose between them. For example
, despite the past when people
had a limited level of relationships, now teens can find new friends from all over the world and choose who is the best option for friendship.
Secondly
, urbanization and industrial society offer citizens many choices
. In the past, people
did not have regular meals and if they had experienced drought, they have starved. In the best conditions, the food for the majority of people
was a simple meal such
as bread and butter or turnip soup, whereas
now people
have too many options which
is too difficult to choose what should eat. Correct pronoun usage
it
For instance
, individuals can order a variety of different meals from online food delivery applications based on their diets whether they are vegetarian or exist on the diet of high-protein.
In conclusion, some individuals argue that people
in the modern era have a myriad of choices
, and it is sometimes difficult to sort out their priorities. I profoundly agree with the point and believe this
condition is prepared due to
social and economic changes in society.Submitted by matty.ebadii on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
The introduction provides a clear opinion and introduces the main points, but the conclusion could be more decisive and summarize the main points more effectively.
task achievement
While the essay responds to the prompt and presents clear ideas, some examples are not fully developed and could be more relevant to the main points.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is generally clear, but transitions between ideas could be improved for better coherence. Additionally, the conclusion is somewhat abrupt and could be more cohesive with the rest of the essay.
lexical resource
The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary and uses complex structures, but there are instances of awkward or unclear phrasing. Some vocabulary could be more precise and tailored to the topic.
grammatical range
While the essay shows a good command of grammar, there are occasional errors in sentence structure, punctuation, and tense consistency. Some sentences are overly complex and could be clarified for better coherence.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!