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Writing Samples
Band 5

as well as , making money, businesses also have social responsibilities. Agree or disagree ?

#money #businesses #responsibilities
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It is not too hard to realize
businesses
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 have
also
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 an impact on society.
This
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 is simply because they have a huge influence on
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the
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money they can easily control the economy.
Moreover
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, a lot of
companies
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 donate to needy
people
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 from all
ways
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walks
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 of life. In
this
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 day and age , the business has become the main factor in the financial system. So , Losing the balance of marketing depends upon how
companies
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 react to their ups and downs.
This
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 business can simply effect increasing prices on the marketing. So
this
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 obviously has negative effects on the inflation.
However
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 , it must not be forgotten that business is beneficial for the country because they have all the cash and banks profit from them. Donating is another key factor that has a strong impact on society and
companies
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 are a huge part of
this
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 process. Nowadays, a lot of
people
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 live in very poor living conditions and suffer from famine. To tackle
this
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 situation
businesses
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 donate lots of money to poor
people
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 to improve their lives as much as possible.
For example
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,
companies
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 can pay medical bills for
people
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 who suffer from health diseases
such
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 as
,
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apply
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 cancer or diabetes.In a way, if philanthropic
companies
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 become popular it will improve society in all domains,
such
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 as finance, education and the environment.
Due to
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 the fact that
businesses
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 can provide money the organizations that respond to the education or environment. I believe it is everyone’s responsibility to help others if it is possible. In conclusion, it seems to me that everyone has social responsibilities ,including
businesses
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 owing to their influence on the country’s economy.And how they supply
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the
a
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needful community with financial support.
Submitted by omondavlat91 on

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Task Response
Ensure that the introduction and conclusion clearly state the position on the topic. Develop a more focused argument that directly addresses the prompt.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on organizing the essay with clear topic sentences for each paragraph, and ensure that ideas flow logically from one to the next.
Lexical Resource
Expand your vocabulary and use more precise terms. Also, pay attention to collocations and word choice.
Grammatical Range
Check for errors in subject-verb agreement, sentence structure, and verb tenses. Use a wider range of grammatical structures and sentence types.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Social responsibilities
  • Corporate social responsibility
  • Ethical behavior
  • Societal impact
  • Stakeholders
  • Profit-driven
  • Public perception
  • Environmental sustainability
  • Community development
  • Human rights
  • Workplace safety
  • Altruism
  • Balanced approach
  • Accountability
  • Consumer loyalty
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