Many people working longer hours, leaving little time for leisure activities. What are the advantages and disadvantages..

In the competitive world, people are working hard to prove themselves in many organizations and leaving less

time

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for other important activities.

This

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essay will explain the demerits of

this

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approach

such

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as the inability to cope with

work

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-life balance and ill-health of many

individuals

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and a few merits like getting fast promotions and business expansion.

To begin

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with,

firstly

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, competition is huge in many corporations

therefore

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professionals are

doing

Verb problem

making

show examples

tireless efforts to prove their abilities which leads to less

time

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for their families and well-being.

For example

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– a survey conducted by the corporate world to check the gist of employees just to get a real sense of how they feel in terms of

work

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-life balance, the majority of them feel overburdened with

work

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leading to less

time

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for themselves.

This

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indicates that

individuals

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feel frustrated and over-utilized with the nature of their

work

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. In order to get promoted in a short span of

time

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, professionals are indulging in many projects

along with

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daily deliverables which have two-sided benefits, on the one hand,

individuals

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get fast promotions

however

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on the other hand

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, businesses usually flourish with

this

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mindset of

individuals

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However

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this

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approach adds more pressure on them and leads to lesser leisure

time

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for their families

as well as

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adds to major issues in their lives that are depression, anxiety, and nervousness.

For example

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– a report published in the Times of India, indicated that many youngsters are getting nervous disorders problems

due to

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stressful situations in their

work

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area.

This

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is proven that many

individuals

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are not getting proper mental satisfaction in their lives

due to

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work

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pressure.

To conclude

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, in order to get faster promotions and foster growth path professionals are working restlessly which helps business expansion

however

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, in

this

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scenario many health issues are creating troubles in their lives.

Therefore

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, balance should be opted out so that willpower and health will not

be suffered

Wrong verb form

suffer

show examples

in the long run.

deep.amans86

Nov 9, 2023

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task response

The essay partially addresses the prompt. It discusses the advantages and disadvantages of working longer hours, but the focus on business growth and fast promotions is not directly relevant to the prompt. It would be beneficial to elaborate more on the impact on leisure activities and personal well-being.

coherence and cohesion

The essay has a logical structure and presents supported main points. However, the introduction and conclusion lack clarity and do not effectively frame the essay. Additionally, the transition between the advantages and disadvantages could be smoother to improve coherence.

lexical resource

The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary and effectively conveys the intended meaning. However, there are instances of imprecise language and awkward phrasing that affect the overall lexical resource.

grammatical range

The essay exhibits a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are some grammatical errors and awkward constructions that could be improved. Additionally, more varied sentence structures would enhance the grammatical range.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

Introduction
Body paragraph 1 – advantages
Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

The main advantage is...
The disadvantage of this...
The main benefit...
Despite these advantages...
One possible drawback...

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

323 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

burnout
work-life balance
productivity
financial gain
career advancement
skill development
personal fulfillment
physical health
mental health
social life
quality of life
neglect
leisure activities

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Many people working longer hours, leaving little time for leisure activities. What are the advantages and disadvantages..

Many governments think that economic progress is the most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Some people believe that there should be the death penalty for extremely serious crimes, others believe that it is not morally, correct to kill criminals discuss both points of view and give your own opinion.

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