Some people think that the best way to increase road safety is to increase the minimum legal for driving cars or riding motorbikes. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is often argued that the best way to increase
road
safety
is by improving the minimum of the existing law
. I totally agree with this
notion because the fact of driving laws are not evenly distributed in several cities and the consequences formulated in today's law
show ineffectiveness in making people learn one's lessons.
riding rules
in particular
areas
are nearly zero, especially in urban locations. This
means the fundamental rules
already
structured by the government, Add a missing verb
are already
however
, the application of the law
is not evenly distributed in several areas
in a country. For instance
, in sub-urban areas
like Depok, it is a must for all motorcycle riders to wear helmets, which are regulated by the local government. However
, the minimum application of the rules
provokes society
to not obey the law
and as a result
, they neglect the obligation to wear helmets. Consequently
, road
accidents may drop in specific cities, where the basic road
regulation
is applied well, but the fact shows that cities without proper road
safety
laws evidently presented a gradual increment in driving violations. Therefore
, increasing the minimum legal for driving cars may positively affect to even distribution of the application of the regulation
, which is crucial regarding transportation accidents.
the continuous number of road
safety
violations proves that the existing law
is not effective in making society
follow the rules
, which results in a huge number of car or motorbikes
accidents year Fix the agreement mistake
motorbike
on
year. Because the disobedience of Change preposition
after
society
translates to the ineffectiveness of the current law
, especially to make people give up. This
means the consequences of the regulation
do not effectively work to hinder society
from breaking the law
. Thus
, the existing law
needs government attention in order to improve, so every rider could pay more attention to it and consequently
, more inhabitants obey the regulation
.
In conclusion, I agree with the initiative of improving road
safety
by increasing the minimum of the law
because the ongoing law
is not applied evenly in several areas
and moreover
, the notion of violator's
fearlessness of the Correct article usage
the violator's
law
's consequences indicates the ineffectiveness of the ongoing law
.Submitted by elroivan on
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task response
The essay fails to fully address the task question. The arguments lack clarity and are not adequately supported with relevant examples. More focus on discussing the impact of increasing the minimum legal age on road safety is required.
coherence cohesion
There is some logical structure in the essay, but the introduction and conclusion could be more clearly presented. The essay lacks a clear progression of ideas and coherence in the development of the discussion. The use of cohesive devices is limited, leading to an inconsistency in the connection of ideas.
lexical resource
The essay demonstrates a sufficient range of vocabulary. However, there are instances of wordiness and awkward phrasing that hinder the clarity of expression. Use of more precise and concise language is recommended.
grammatical range
The essay displays a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are errors in subject-verb agreement, verb tense, and sentence construction. Greater attention to sentence structure and grammar accuracy is necessary.