Many jobs require ongoing training and research to stay competitive in a world with rapidly evolving information and technology. Some believe that it is the responsibility of businesses to pay for this training for their staff while others feel it is up to the individual. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

While
some argue that employees should pay for their professional
pieces of
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apply
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training by themselves, others believe that employers must provide their staff with relatively up-to-date learning support.
Although
,
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self-education gives workers more freedom and flexibility in their future careers, I agree with the first opinion as on-work training courses provide workers with area-specific knowledge,
as well as
can be considered as an additional item in a benefits package, especially for entry-level positions. On the one hand, professional courses paid by workers give them the opportunity to view other available qualifications and a chance to change their career halfway of study.
For instance
, someone who started to study a Human Resources Management course may realize that they are more interested in the payroll module and apply for Payroll Adviser certification which leads them directly to their desired role. If a company pays for their study, employees are obliged to finish the course, and
also
a bond might be applied to their contract.
On the other hand
, businesses providing education and pieces of training on sites, place them in the labour market in a better position because
firstly
, their training is industry-specific, and
secondly
, highly appreciated by new starters and graduates as an additional benefit.
For example
, there are some software used exclusively in the hospitality industry
such
as Opera, Ichris, and Microster. World-famous hotels are teaching their staff how to use these systems from scratch, and
also
on a regular basis to make sure that their skills and knowledge are up to date. In conclusion,
while
self-paid education provides better flexibility in moving to
further
career opportunities, I believe that training on-site results in more updated knowledge and skills,
as well as
plays
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play
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a beneficial role for staff , especially post-graduates.
Submitted by lea12nz on

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task achievement
Ensure that you elaborate slightly more on key points to make your arguments more compelling. You have provided relevant examples, but expanding them would strengthen your essay further.
coherence cohesion
Be cautious of minor grammatical and punctuation errors. For example, the phrase 'pieces of training' should be 'training' and 'on sites' should be 'on-site'.
introduction
The essay starts with a clear introduction that sets up the debate and states the writer's opinion, which provides a good framework for your argument.
task achievement
You have used relevant examples to support your main points, demonstrating an understanding of the topic.
conclusion
The conclusion effectively summarizes your arguments and restates your opinion, which provides a coherent end to the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

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  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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