IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The diagrams below show the life cycle of a species of large fish called salmon. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagrams below show the life cycle of a species of large fish called salmon. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#diagrams #show #life #cycle #species #fish #salmon #summaries #information #features #comparisons
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the diagrams give us information about the life cycle of a species of big size fish
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
called salmon ,
Linking Words
overall
Rephrase
apply
show examples
it can be seen that they go
Correct your spelling
through
show examples
though
Correct your spelling
through
show examples
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
3 stages in
their
Change the word
the
show examples
 whole
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their life first of all, salmon eggs are in the
deepth
Correct your spelling
depth
 of
river
Add an article
the river
show examples
 between
smol
Correct your spelling
small
stons
Correct your spelling
stones
stone
as well as
Linking Words
in to
Join the words
into
show examples
 reeds which come from
Correct article usage
the
show examples
upper river these eggs
staded
Correct your spelling
stay
 in there for around 5-6 months , after that eggs
are becoming
Wrong verb form
become
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fry
Wrong verb form
fried
show examples
that their size
are
Change the verb form
is
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 from 3 to 8 cm ,
then
Linking Words
 they
diving
Change the form of the verb
dive
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in to
Join the words
into
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lower river they remain for 4 years ,
finally
Linking Words
 they grown up at
this
Linking Words
 stage they called
smot
Correct your spelling
spot
 their size are about 12-15 cm ,
nexe
Correct your spelling
next
 they jump in to open sea
moreover
Linking Words
 ,they
reamain
Correct your spelling
remain
 for
approximatly
Correct your spelling
approximately
 5
year
Change to a plural noun
years
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, after 5
yeas
Correct your spelling
years
show examples
 they going to become adult
their
Replace the word
they're
they are
show examples
 lengthy expanded to minimum 70 cm . when they become adult all of their cycle life are repeated .
Submitted by dler_shakar on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 70%.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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