Some people think that sending criminals to prison is not effective. Instead, they should receive education and job training. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #criminals #prison #education #job

Crime is always bad

as well as

the criminals. Some people prefer to educate the criminals rather than punishment. I totally agree with

this

statement. The primary reason to support

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

education is that it helps them to differentiate

the

Change preposition

between the

show examples

good and bad. If they can learn the details of bad things and the procedures of escaping from those, they might avoid any

types

Fix the agreement mistake

type

show examples

of crime.

For example

, to eradicate

youth-criminals

Correct your spelling

youth criminals

show examples

Bangladesh developed

youth

Correct article usage

a youth

show examples

training centre.

Thus

, the positive change is notable. Youngers are now inclined

on developing

Change preposition

to develop

show examples

themselves

whereas

previously they were involved in bad

works

Fix the agreement mistake

work

show examples

. Another reason to promote study is the increase

Change preposition

show examples

employment.

In contrast

, unemployment is

also

a reason

Change preposition

for

show examples

committing

crime

Fix the agreement mistake

crimes

show examples

to earn money.

Study

Wrong verb form

Studying

show examples

however

, helps them to get a better job to lead their life. After completion of

study

Add a comma

study,

show examples

everybody gets a good job, which ensures them a good source of income.

For instance

, most of the

universitities

Correct your spelling

universities

in Germany have a link with the employers, which

help

Correct subject-verb agreement

helps

show examples

the students to get a better job.

On the other hand

, sending prison could not

ensures

Change the verb form

ensure

show examples

the income source.

Therefore

, after coming from that they continue their activities. In conclusion, it can be said that teaching is the best medicine for a criminal. Without training, it is not possible to stop any

types

Fix the agreement mistake

type

show examples

of criminal

activities

Fix the agreement mistake

activity

show examples

Submitted by tanvir0507 on Fri Nov 10 2023

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task response

The introduction could be more explicit in addressing the topic. Include a clear thesis statement to demonstrate a strong position on the issue.

coherence and cohesion

The logical structure of the essay is adequate, but the use of cohesive devices could be improved to enhance the overall coherence. Make sure to use transitional words and phrases to connect ideas more effectively.

lexical resource

The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, but there is room for improvement in terms of using more sophisticated and precise vocabulary to convey ideas more effectively.

grammatical range

While the essay displays a generally accurate and varied use of grammatical structures, some sentences are awkward or unclear. Work on sentence structure and ensure that complex sentences are used appropriately.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

222 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that sending criminals to prison is not effective. Instead, they should receive education and job training. Do you agree or disagree?

Word Count

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Some students prefer to take a gap year between high school and university, to work or to travel. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages

Scientists found that most crimes are committed by people who lack education. Some people think that the best way to reduce the crime rate is to provide prisoners with education because it will help them find a job when they leave prison. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Each year, the crime rate increases. What are the causes of crime and what could be done to prevent this rise in criminal activity?

A lot of money is spent nowadays searching for oil. As the world's oil resources will eventually run out, it would be more logical to spend some of this money on developing new sources of power, such as wind and solar. To what extent do you agree or disagree?