Some people think that sending criminals to prison is not effective. Instead, they should receive education and job training. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #criminals #prison #education #job

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Crime is always bad

as well as

Linking Words

the criminals. Some people prefer to educate the criminals rather than punishment. I totally agree with

this

Linking Words

statement. The primary reason to support

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

education is that it helps them to differentiate

the

Change preposition

between the

show examples

good and bad. If they can learn the details of bad things and the procedures of escaping from those, they might avoid any

types

Fix the agreement mistake

type

show examples

of crime.

For example

Linking Words

, to eradicate

youth-criminals

Correct your spelling

youth criminals

show examples

Bangladesh developed

youth

Correct article usage

a youth

show examples

training centre.

Thus

Linking Words

, the positive change is notable. Youngers are now inclined

on developing

Change preposition

to develop

show examples

themselves

whereas

Linking Words

previously they were involved in bad

works

Fix the agreement mistake

work

show examples

. Another reason to promote study is the increase

Change preposition

show examples

employment.

In contrast

Linking Words

, unemployment is

also

Linking Words

a reason

Change preposition

for

show examples

committing

crime

Fix the agreement mistake

crimes

show examples

to earn money.

Study

Wrong verb form

Studying

show examples

however

Linking Words

, helps them to get a better job to lead their life. After completion of

study

Add a comma

study,

show examples

everybody gets a good job, which ensures them a good source of income.

For instance

Linking Words

, most of the

universitities

Correct your spelling

universities

in Germany have a link with the employers, which

help

Correct subject-verb agreement

helps

show examples

the students to get a better job.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, sending prison could not

ensures

Change the verb form

ensure

show examples

the income source.

Therefore

Linking Words

, after coming from that they continue their activities. In conclusion, it can be said that teaching is the best medicine for a criminal. Without training, it is not possible to stop any

types

Fix the agreement mistake

type

show examples

of criminal

activities

Fix the agreement mistake

activity

show examples

Submitted by tanvir0507 on Fri Nov 10 2023

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task response

The introduction could be more explicit in addressing the topic. Include a clear thesis statement to demonstrate a strong position on the issue.

coherence and cohesion

The logical structure of the essay is adequate, but the use of cohesive devices could be improved to enhance the overall coherence. Make sure to use transitional words and phrases to connect ideas more effectively.

lexical resource

The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, but there is room for improvement in terms of using more sophisticated and precise vocabulary to convey ideas more effectively.

grammatical range

While the essay displays a generally accurate and varied use of grammatical structures, some sentences are awkward or unclear. Work on sentence structure and ensure that complex sentences are used appropriately.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

222 words

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Some people think that sending criminals to prison is not effective. Instead, they should receive education and job training. Do you agree or disagree?

Word Count

All cars that burn fossil fuels should be banned and electric cars should replace them. Do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays online shopping is extremely popular. Discuss the impact of it on the environment and on people who lost their jobs because of it.

Children spend a lot of time watching TV and playing computer games; however, it does not help in improving their mental abilities. Do you agree or disagree.

Despite a large number of gyms, a sedentary lifestyle is gaining popular in the contemporary world. What problems are associated with this? What solution can you suggest.