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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

65.The chart below shows what Anthropology graduates from one university did after finishing their undergraduate degree course. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

65.The chart below shows what Anthropology graduates from one university did after finishing their undergraduate degree course. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
#anthropology #graduates #university #course #information #features #comparisons
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The pie chart illustrates the destination of Anthropology
students
Use synonyms
 after graduating from one university,
while
Linking Words
 the table shows the salaries of these
students
Use synonyms
 after 5 years of work.
Overall
Linking Words
, most of the
students
Use synonyms
 found a full-time
job
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 there is
also
Linking Words
 a small
proportion
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 that are studying postgraduate and doing a part-time
job
Use synonyms
.
Also
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 working in the government sector, have the highest salaries. More than half of
students
Use synonyms
 found full-time work, specifically, 52%, having the largest
proportion
Use synonyms
. Followed by those who have a part-time
job
Use synonyms
, with only 15% of the
overall
Linking Words
 share, which is 3% higher than those who are unemployed, with 12%.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, individuals who are studying postgraduate and have a full-time
job
Use synonyms
, occupy 8% of the total share,
whereas
Linking Words
 it is the same
proportion
Use synonyms
 of those
students
Use synonyms
 who do not know what they are doing, the
students
Use synonyms
 doing part-time jobs and studying postgraduate, have the lowest
proportion
Use synonyms
, with only 5%. Individuals after working 5 years, 40% of those who work as freelance consultants have a
salary
Use synonyms
 between $75,000- $99,000 and the other 40% have a
salary
Use synonyms
 of $100,000 or more. 5% of
people
Use synonyms
 working in freelance consultants and the government sector have a
salary
Use synonyms
 of $25,000 to $49,999 and 15% of
people
Use synonyms
 working in these sectors have a
salary
Use synonyms
 of $50,000 to $74,999,
while
Linking Words
 50% of
people
Use synonyms
 who have a
job
Use synonyms
 in the government sector has a
salary
Use synonyms
 of more than $100,000
Submitted by elenazheng1211 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, overall, while".
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words students, job, proportion, people, salary with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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