IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary schools rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

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One of the most important issues in modern society is that learning a foreign
language
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 is necessary for the modern education system. There are those who say that the better period for younger
people
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 to learn a new one is in elementary educational
institution
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institutions
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 rather than in secondary school. In
this
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 essay, I will examine the benefits and downsides of
this
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 issue and provide my
overall
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 opinion. From an
overall
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 perspective, there are several advantages of studying an international
language
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 from the beginning of education.
Firstly
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, it is believed that
at
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in
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 the
time
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 of early days, they have exceptional abilities for learning new things,
also
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 during
this
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 period, they can gather a lot of things.
For instance
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, we memorized a few poems when we were
infant
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infants
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.
Still
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Still,
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 now, we can easily say that poem any
time
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 without
revision
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a revision
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.
Secondly
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, learning a new way to communicate with other
people
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together with
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 a native tongue,
which
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apply
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will improve
better
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apply
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pronunciation and fluency.
Such
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 as the junior generation can use these benefits by watching educational cartoons,
read
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reading
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 books
as well
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as
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and
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play
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playing
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 video games in other languages. Despite these arguments, there are
also
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 various disadvantages for kids to
learning
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learn
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 non-native languages. Non-resident
language
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 will take a lot of
time
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, and they can become tired. Specifically, the curriculum is not
age appropriate
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age-appropriate
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due to
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 their knowledge
limited
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being limited
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 at that youth
time
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. A
further
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 point against unfamiliar languages is because of
this
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, they will not communicate and spend enough
time
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 with friends and siblings, which may lead to shyness and loss of social skills. In conclusion, it must be said that
,
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apply
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 learning a foreign
language
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 at primary school has clear advantages and disadvantages. My personal view is that it might help young
people
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 develop and strengthen their skills and better communication with native
people
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.
However
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, I still believe that the benefits of learning another
language
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at
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in
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junior
Correct article usage
the junior
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 generation
is
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are
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 essential if we balance their learning scope and
time
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.

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task response
Provide more specific and relevant examples to support your points. Make sure to answer the question directly and address all parts of the prompt.
coherence and cohesion
You have a good overall structure, but pay attention to ensuring that your ideas are logically connected within and between paragraphs. Also, work on providing a stronger conclusion to summarize your main points.
lexical resource
Expand and vary your vocabulary to express ideas more precisely. Additionally, be cautious with word choice and use idiomatic expressions accurately.
grammatical range
Your essay demonstrates a relatively good command of grammatical structures. However, pay attention to sentence structure, verb tense consistency, and use of articles.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cognitive development
  • Enhance
  • Problem-solving skills
  • Pronunciation
  • Mimic
  • Native-like accent
  • Cultural awareness
  • Sensitivity
  • Exposure
  • Resource allocation
  • Qualified
  • Effective instruction
  • Overwhelmed
  • Curriculum
  • Undermining
  • Mother tongue
  • Prioritizing
What to do next:
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