The percentage of overweight children in western society has increased by almost 20% in the last ten years. Discuss the causes and effects of this disturbing trend. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Nowadays, the number of obese children is rising day by day.
According to
the Western Society survey, there is
an increase in the number of overweight offspring by almost 20%, in the past decade. Wrong verb form
has been
This
essay will look at the core reasons for this
and propose some solid solutions.
One of the main causes of the problem is that children prefer junk food over a healthy meal. This
can weaken their body and produce fats which lead them to be obese and this
overweightness can cause many problems in their life. For example
, an obese child cannot participate in athletic activities and is restricted to some other places. The solution is for the state to raise taxes on these types of food or restrict or ban these products.
Another problem is the ignorance of parents
. In this
world parents
are the best supervisors of their offspring. To explore this
idea I mean that, parents
nowadays do not supervise the food of their offspring due to
their busy schedule and children are not mature enough to think about what is good for their health and what is bad. The way forward could be to punish the parents
of obese offspring, so they can take better care of their offspring afterwards. Furthermore
, This
can be genetic. Most offspring are obese because their parents
or one of them are obese and this
obesity in the child comes through a genetical
process. Replace the word
genetic
For example
, a recent study shows that over 60% of obese offspring in Pakistan are genetically or say obese by birth. To tackle this
issue, the government could open physical activity centres all over the country for obese offspring to do physical activities which would make them fit and active.
To sum up
, obesity is causing many problems in the life of those who suffer from this
, due to
reasons such
as eating junk foods, lack of guardian supervision and genetics. This
is a serious issue, and unless the authority and parents
do not take a step forward in this
issue, the offspring will suffer till death. My view is that the main responsibility for solving the dilemma lies with parents
and the state.Submitted by umark5353 on
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task response
The essay addresses the causes and effects of the increasing percentage of overweight children in western society in a largely coherent manner. However, the main points lack depth and development, which affects the overall completeness of the response.
coherence and cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is generally clear, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the lack of development in supporting the main points affects the overall coherence and cohesion of the essay.
lexical resource
The essay demonstrates a satisfactory range of vocabulary and uses a mix of simple and complex expressions. However, there is room for improvement in the use of specific lexical items related to the topic of obesity and its causes and effects.
grammatical range
The essay displays a reasonable command of grammar and sentence structures. However, there are instances of awkward phrasing and errors in sentence construction that affect the overall fluency and accuracy of the essay.