In some countries, younger people are neglecting their right to vote. What problems does this cause and what are some of the possible solutions?

In some parts of the world, the fact that young
people
are reluctant to vote in an election is still becoming an issue. I believe, there are many reasons that might lead to
this
problem
, but the solutions
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
to be
hand
Wrong verb form
handed
show examples
over to the government and the
individuals
in each
countries
Change to a singular noun
country
show examples
. The first cause that might be
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
reason why
this
problem
exists is
the
Correct your spelling
that
show examples
politicians have bad track records. Indonesia can
examplifies
Correct your spelling
examine
this
phenomenon, where some politicians had done the
coruption
Correct your spelling
corruption
in many
institution
Change to a plural noun
institutions
show examples
such
as education.
This
has made the citizens unsure and
untrust
Correct your spelling
untrusted
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
.
As a result
, they are unwilling to use their rights to vote since they
regard
Verb problem
believe
show examples
it will not affect anything for
the
Change the word
their
show examples
future
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
theirs
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
. The second reason is the
candidats’
Correct your spelling
candidates’
mission
Fix the agreement mistake
missions
show examples
are often subtle and unrealistic which can be seen in their campaigns. The
individuals
reluctantly consider them in the election. These causes
had
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
proven that the politicians’ behaviour
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
essential to be
assesed
Correct your spelling
assessed
.
However
, there are two possible solutions to overcome
this
problem
.
Firstly
, The governments, in their period have to punish the politicians who did the
coruption
Correct your spelling
corruption
. It will determine the quality of
people
who have responsibility for a country in terms of running every
programs
Change to a singular noun
program
show examples
in the next period.
Secondly
, the
individuals
, particularly young
people
of each country should have an awareness of the importance of the candidates’ track records by digging information more and more. They have to utilize the advancement of technology to look for it. In conclusion, even though
this
problem
is still becoming
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
issue, by analysing the causes, it still can be tackled not only by the governments but
also
by the
individuals
especially
Add the comma(s)
, especially
show examples
the young
people
in many countries in the world.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure that there is a clear overarching structure to your essay, with distinct introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Each paragraph should have a clear central idea and be distinct from the others.
coherence cohesion
Work on developing each main point with clear, specific, and relevant examples or explanations that directly relate to the prompt. Where possible, include statistics, dates, or real-world ramifications to support your points.
task achievement
Fully address all parts of the task, making sure to answer each question posed by the prompt specifically and explicitly. Ensure you provide a balanced discussion of both problems and solutions.
task achievement
Aim to write clear and comprehensive ideas, making sure each is fully developed and explored within your paragraphs. It's important to elaborate on how each idea links back to the main topic and to include a variety of complex sentence structures.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • democratic process
  • political instability
  • skewed representation
  • governance
  • erosion
  • civic education
  • alienation
  • policy-making
  • accessible
  • incentives
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!