In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

#countries #world #people #cities #population #countryside #development

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Urbanisation

plays

Wrong verb form

has played

show examples

a big role in world development

last

Linking Words

decades enhancing

relocation

Correct article usage

the relocation

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of a lot of people to the cities area.

However

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

movement has some drawbacks in

Correct article usage

the countrysides

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countrysides

Fix the agreement mistake

countryside

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, indicating a simultaneous increase in urban populations and a decrease in rural populations. Some conservative people tend to assert that urban development has no positive facets. It causes a lack of workforce at farms,

Correct word choice

apply

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it can lead to

failure

Correct article usage

the failure

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of natural products and price

increase

Fix the agreement mistake

increases

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Change preposition

apply

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them

Correct pronoun usage

apply

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Furthermore

Linking Words

urbanizations

Fix the agreement mistake

urbanization

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experts discuss a consistent upward trend contributing to overpopulation in urban areas.

This

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creates some challenges like increased congestion, environmental issues and

stain

Fix the agreement mistake

stains

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on urban resources.

Such

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a great example could be New York City -

the

Correct article usage

show examples

overpopulated place with various challenges.

For example

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, there are some ecological problems like poor air and water quality, lack of green space and,

Linking Words

addition

Add the comma(s)

addition,

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there is a tough rent situation. On another hand,

Correct word choice

apply

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also

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think, there is a huge plus in moving

population

Correct article usage

the population

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from the villages to the cities.

Firstly

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, humans gain

better

Add an article

a better

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quality of life

such

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as improved access to education and health care. I have a friend who recently moved to the city, and thanks to that relocation, he is able to receive full medical care support to treat his diabetes.

As well as

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, urban migrants start to have a vast range of opportunities for skill development, networking, and realizing their aspirations, offering a transformative journey for those seeking a better life.

For instance

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, Karl Lagerfeld gained access to the high fashion world, he worked at the fashion houses like Chanel, Fendi and Chloe. Thanks to

that

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the

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opportunities he found in Paris, he managed to build his career only after moving to Paris from his native small town. Individuals who once had limited options in their hometowns might now explore careers in technology, entrepreneurship, or the arts. In conclusion, rural-to-urban migration has both positive and negative impacts, but I firmly believe

this

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situation is mostly beneficial.

Submitted by bbelozertseva on Sun Nov 12 2023

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task response

Ensure to address the prompt fully by discussing both positive and negative aspects of rural-to-urban migration. Provide more relevant and specific examples to support your points.

coherence and cohesion

The structure of the essay is mostly logical, but ensure to use transition words and phrases to better connect ideas and improve the coherence of the essay.

lexical resource

Your use of vocabulary is quite good, but try to incorporate more varied and sophisticated vocabulary to enhance your lexical resource.

grammatical range

Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar to avoid awkward phrasing and errors. Work on using a variety of sentence structures to demonstrate a wider range of grammatical structures.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

327 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

rural-to-urban migration
population shift
positive impact
negative impact
urbanization
job opportunities
access to education
access to healthcare
urban infrastructure
rural traditions
cultural heritage

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In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Your opinion

Sales companies should recruit people who are hungry for money as they will make the most dedicated workers.Do you think money is the driving force behind hard work? What factors should be taken into consideration when recruiting staff for sales positions

In the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying. To what extend do you agree or disagree with thos statement?

Art classes such as painting drawing, are one important a child's developement as other subjects, so it should be compulosry in igh schools. To what extent to do agree or disagree?

Large companies should pay CEOs and executives higher salary than other workers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?