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Band 2.5

Some people believe that children's time outside of school should be filled with scheduled activities such as art and music classes and sports. Others feel that children need free time to play and relax. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #children #time #school #activities #art #music #classes #sports
There is
a
Change the article
an
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 ongoing debate regarding children's discipline. Some individuals argue that spare
time
 should be filled with productive activities,
while
 others contend that spending free
time
by
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apply
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playing in the
neighborhood
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neighbourhood
show examples
 is essential. I wholeheartedly believe that children have to pursue both relaxing and busy activities.
While
 the human brain
start
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starts
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 to form at a young age, it is
a
Correct article usage
apply
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common knowledge that commencing the juvenile period with
focus
Add an article
a focus
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 on education is significant for the sustainable development of the mind and logical skills.
Also
, at an early age broaden their horizon.
Majority
Correct article usage
The majority
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 of teenagers currently cannot determine the field they should develop in or the career they aim to succeed
, often
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in, often
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 because they have spent their
chilhood
Correct your spelling
childhood
 engaged in unproductive or leisurely activities. To delve deeper, let's explore some examples. Many youngsters
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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lack
competent
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competence
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 in the advancement of life, they have no idea about
further
 improvements in our modern technologies. One of the contributing factors is
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
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 of thinking and brain work skills.
That is
 why, children's free
time
have
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has
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 to be well scheduled in
favor
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favour
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 of their mind,
life
Correct word choice
and life
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 consciousness.
Regarding spending
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Spending
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 free
time
on play
Wrong verb form
playing
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 and relax, it is essential for youth's personal memories.
Moreover
, childhood
,
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apply
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 is one of the
delighted
Replace the word
delightful
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 moments for a child. Because
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task response
Ensure that all parts of the essay question are addressed, and include relevant specific examples to support your points. Focus on maintaining a clear and logical structure throughout.
coherence cohesion
Work on developing a clearer introduction and conclusion to frame your essay. Use linking words and transitions to improve the overall coherence and cohesion of your ideas.
lexical resource
Expand your vocabulary to include more precise and varied lexical choices. Additionally, pay attention to the accuracy of word usage and collocations.
grammatical range
Review the usage of complex sentence structures, verb tenses, and punctuation to ensure greater accuracy and variety. Also, be mindful of subject-verb agreement and sentence clarity.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
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