IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Governments should offer college and university education free of charge to all students. Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.

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Introduction
The
government
Use synonyms
’s policy to provide free access to all
citizens
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 in pursuing higher
education
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 at the college and university level still remains debatable. I strongly believe that the
authority
Fix the agreement mistake
authorities
show examples
 should prioritize free
education
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 as a fundamental need of their
citizens
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 to alleviate their economic level.
However
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, there are
also
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 several considerations needed in regard to budget constraints and other priorities of
government
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 roles.
Body · 1
To begin
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 with,
education
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 is the key point to unlocking individual potential so they can get a decent job to enhance their welfare.
For example
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,
Indonesia
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 provides a
government
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 scholarship scheme called LPDP to support its
citizens
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 in pursuing higher
education
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, specifically supporting those who want to study abroad. Based on the Ministry of
Education
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 and Culture survey in 2019, most of the awardees who are coming from middle and lower-income statuses get a higher salary after graduation.
Therefore
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, the
education
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 scholarship allows them to break ties and help their families in terms of economic scale.
Body · 2
In addition
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,
Indonesia
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 with its vibrant culture and heterogeneous society can benefit from its investment in democratizing
education
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. In matters of equal rights for all races and religions,
this
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 could help indigenous
community
Fix the agreement mistake
communities
show examples
 from
Indonesia
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, who lack
education
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 access
due to
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 the economy, have an opportunity to equip themselves with a broad knowledge and give back to their home.
For example
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, there was an awardee from the Baduy Indigenous people who had an opportunity to study anthropology at the University of
Indonesia
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 with a
government
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 scholarship.
Therefore
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, they can help the
government
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 in achieving a national economic building across the region in
Indonesia
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, specifically in Banten province.
Body · 3
However
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, it is a fact that the
government
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also
Linking Words
 has other priorities
such
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 as security, healthcare system, and many more.
Thus
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, the budget is limited and needs thorough research and consideration in creating a wise approach. Providing a free
education
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 can be a hard decision for developing
countries
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such
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 as
Indonesia
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—considering the restricted budget and other priorities.
In addition
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, there are
also
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 people who
are coming
Wrong verb form
come
show examples
 from higher income status and
able
Add a missing verb
are able
show examples
 to
backing
Wrong verb form
back up
show examples
 their
education
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 independently yet it should be noted that only 10% of
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
 in
Indonesia
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belong
Correct subject-verb agreement
belongs
show examples
 to
this
Linking Words
 income group.
Therefore
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, free
education
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 still needs to be prioritized.
Conclusion
In conclusion, I strongly agree that free
education
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 is a good practice to support human resources development, specifically in developing
countries
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. With many positive benefits from
this
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 policy, many
countries
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 like
Indonesia
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 can alleviate their status from developing to developed
countries
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 with well-equipped
citizens
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 as
government
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 assets to accelerate the country’s development.

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task response
Provide a more balanced argument by addressing potential drawbacks of free education to strengthen the counterargument.
coherence cohesion
Maintain clear and consistent progression of ideas within and between paragraphs to enhance coherence and cohesion.
lexical resource
Utilize a wider range of vocabulary to express ideas with more precision and sophistication.
grammatical range
Demonstrate greater flexibility and accuracy in sentence structures and grammatical forms to improve fluency and coherence.
Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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