IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Under British and Australia laws a jury in a criminal case has no access to information about the defendant's past criminal record . This protects the person who is being accused of the crime. Some lawyers have suggested that this practice should be changed and that a jury should be given all the past facts before they reach their decision about the case. Do you agree or disagree?

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Several barristers supposed that all the defendant's past criminal
records
Use synonyms
 should be given to a
jury
Use synonyms
 before they make a decision about the particular illegal case.
While
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this
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 may work to a certain extent, I think it
also
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 has its dark sides.
To begin
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 with, it is understandable why giving past criminal profiles is a feasible option. The reason is that
according to
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 the past
records
Use synonyms
 of law-breakers, authorities can make
a more precise decisions
Correct the article-noun agreement
more precise decisions
a more precise decision
show examples
.
And
Correct word choice
Then
show examples
then
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, the
jury
Use synonyms
 depends on the perfect alibis of
crime
Correct article usage
the crime
show examples
 and gives a proper verdict.
For example
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, many cases in Vietnam
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 tackled by giving past criminal documents.
Therefore
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, many
barrister
Change to a plural noun
barristers
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 want to give the previous profiles of the crime to the
jury
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
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, there are many reasons why authorities should not be given past criminal documents. It is
rationale
Correct your spelling
rational
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 that the juries can have knowledge about the condition of people who took part in unlawful activities and after that, they may make an unbiased decision.
For instance
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, with a wealthy condition, the
crime
Replace the word
criminal
show examples
 who
want
Correct subject-verb agreement
wants
show examples
 to escape from punishment can offer the
jury
Use synonyms
 an inducement.
In addition
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, all defendant's criminal
records
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also
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 give the judge
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
an unfair mind. The boards can rely on their emotions and give the trumped-up charges for the innocent.
As a result
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, the people who are miscarriages of justice can not find out their justice. In conclusion,
this
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 statement has its advantages and disadvantages. Giving previous criminal
records
Use synonyms
 affects remarkably on making a precise and equal
desion
Correct your spelling
decision
design
 leading to a fair society.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure the introduction effectively paraphrases the prompt and presents a clear opinion. Focus on developing main points with clear topic sentences that align with the thesis stated.
coherence cohesion
Work on logically organizing the essay. Paragraphs should have clear connections and proper transitions to enhance readability. Maintain a consistent line of reasoning throughout.
task achievement
You addressed the task and presented your opinion. However, your response should be more fully developed. Include more specific examples and explanations to back up your viewpoints.
task achievement
Avoid general statements and aim to provide concrete, relevant examples that convincingly support your arguments.
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