Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar; which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?
It is argued that
prices
of sugary products
should be increased in order to prevent people
Change preposition
from getting
getting
health problems. Change preposition
from getting
This
essay completely agrees with this
statement because by
increasing the Change preposition
apply
price
of high sugar
Add a hyphen
high-sugar
products
, these
will not be profitable for the consumers, Correct pronoun usage
apply
also
individuals
will be aware of how harmful these products
are.
People
will be less willing to buy produts
with high level Correct your spelling
products
in
sugar if the Change preposition
of
prices
of these products
increases
. Change the verb form
increase
This
is because sugary products
are only snacks, not a
normal meal, so is not profitable for Correct article usage
apply
individuals
to spend more money in
sweets, Change preposition
on
that
are bad for their health, than Correct pronoun usage
which
in
Change preposition
on
products
such
as vegetables and rice which its cheap and provides sources of vitamins which keep their body healthy. For instance
, Japan increased prices
of sweets and chocolate Correct article usage
the prices
since
2019 which reduced sales of Change preposition
in
this
Correct determiner usage
these
produts
Correct your spelling
product
products
in
approximately 70%.
Change preposition
by
Individuals
are unaware about
how harmful are the Change preposition
of
products
they consume. Normally, when individuals
buy a product, they only think of the taste and the price
. Sugary products
are cheap to produce and also
, sold at a low price
, allowing many people
to be able to afford it
. Consuming Correct pronoun usage
them
this
Change the determiner
this product
these products
products
leads to many health problems, which they are not aware until
they go to the doctor. Change preposition
of until
For instance
, 50% of American adults are obese due to
excessive consumption of sugary products
, so increasing the price
of these products
, diabetes and obesity cases will reduce
.
In conclusion, increasing the Verb problem
apply
price
of products
with high
level of sugar will let Add an article
a high
the high
people
know that is
not profitable to buy these products
and allow people
to know the damages that these goods causes
to their body, Change the verb form
cause
therefore
, I believe, that the prices
of the sugary products
should be increased.Submitted by elenazheng1211 on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear and logical arrangement of ideas throughout the essay to enhance the flow of information and make it easier for the reader to follow your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Introduction and conclusion should be clear, concise, and effectively bookend the essay, summarizing your stance and the content of your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Support main points with clear, relevant examples, and make sure they are well-explained to effectively argue your point of view.
task achievement
Address all parts of the task comprehensively, ensuring full coverage of the topic without irrelevant details or omissions.
task achievement
Clarify and expand your ideas fully, providing a comprehensive analysis that supports your thesis and helps to persuade your reader effectively.
task achievement
Provide specific examples that directly support your argument. Make sure the examples are detailed and relevant to your point.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?