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Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

The graph shows the number of visitors to a variety of art galleries in 2011. Summarize the information by selecting and repo fling the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph shows the number of visitors to a variety of art galleries in 2011. Summarize the information by selecting and repo fling the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#visitors #variety #art #galleries #information #repo #features #comparisons
The data illustrates the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of guests to a collection of art galleries in several countries in 2011.
Overall
,
Louvre
Correct article usage
the Louvre
show examples
museum
Capitalize word
Museum
show examples
 in France attracted more people in the period given. Followed by
Metropolitan
Correct article usage
the Metropolitan
show examples
Museum
 in
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
 and
British
Correct article usage
the British
show examples
Museum
 in
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
.
Whereas
, the least number of visitors
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
National
Correct article usage
the National
show examples
Museum
 of Korea,
Moseo
Correct your spelling
Museo
 del Prado in Spain and
State
Correct article usage
the State
show examples
 Hermitage in
Rusia
Correct your spelling
Russia
show examples
. Louvre in France became the peak season which surely had the most number of
attandees
Correct your spelling
attendees
 at about 8.9 million
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people.
Furthermore
,
Metropolitan
Correct article usage
the Metropolitan
show examples
Museum
 in
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
 and
British
Correct article usage
the British
show examples
Museum
 in
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
succed
Correct your spelling
succeeded
to gain
Change preposition
in gaining
show examples
 about 6.0 and 5.8 million
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
visitors respectively.
On the other hand
, the amount of attendance was
one-thirds
Correct your spelling
one-third
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 lower in the remaining
museum
 compared to
Louvre
Correct article usage
the Louvre
show examples
Museum
. Around 3.2, 3.0, and 2.9 million
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people were recorded to stop by the National
Museum
 of Korea, Museo del Prado in Spain, and State Hermitage in
Rusia
Correct your spelling
Russia
show examples
 respectively.
Submitted by asyifannisakh on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words museum with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • visitor numbers
  • fluctuations
  • peak season
  • off-peak season
  • trend
  • visitor demographics
  • attendance
  • special exhibition
  • promotional campaign
  • footfall
  • gallery capacity
  • cultural attraction
  • art enthusiasts
  • exhibit
  • statistical comparison
  • tourist attraction
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