Some people believe that the best way to stay fit is to join aa gym or a health club, while others think doing everyday activities such as walking and climbing stairs is enough. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #aa #gym #health #club #activities #stairs

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Keeping fit and doing some exercises to have an active lifestyle and better health condition are well-discussed matters in the modern world. Numerous

people

Use synonyms

have an idea that the best result to be in

shape

Use synonyms

is to join a

gym

Use synonyms

or health club.

However

Linking Words

, others believe that doing everyday

activities

Use synonyms

can have good effects on the body, and there is no necessity to spend time in the gyms to work out. The idea provokes strong arguments, which both sides will discuss and reach a conclusion. On the one hand, the opponents of participating sports

centers

Change the spelling

centres

show examples

claim that nowadays, excessive daily routines lead to gaining better

shape

Use synonyms

For example

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

with different kinds of careers have various

activities

Use synonyms

during their weekdays which could be a sort of exercise,

such

Linking Words

as teachers, staying on their feet all day which means they are enough active to burn fat and stay in

shape

Use synonyms

without joining any health clubs. By

this

Linking Words

, we mean that

this

Linking Words

type of activity is suitable to maintain the body in good

shape

Use synonyms

Furthermore

Linking Words

, others reckon that going to a

gym

Use synonyms

is as costly and time-consuming as doing daily

activities

Use synonyms

For instance

Linking Words

, some

people

Use synonyms

can not afford to pay tuition for

gym

Use synonyms

classes, and they prefer to do their daily

activities

Use synonyms

by climbing stairs or walking to their office in the morning as a route to increase their heartbeat and increase their metabolism in order to be in

shape

Use synonyms

. Proponents of joining the

gym

Use synonyms

and sports club assert that going to a

gym

Use synonyms

can motivate

people

Use synonyms

to stay fit and have excellent physical condition.

For instance

Linking Words

, in a

gym

Use synonyms

environment,

people

Use synonyms

see each other. By

this

Linking Words

, we mean that members of the

gym

Use synonyms

can influence each other and compete with each other to have a better

shape

Use synonyms

Moreover

Linking Words

, exercise can help obese

people

Use synonyms

who have a sedentary life to become aware of their undesirable situation and seek a remedy for their impairment.

This

Linking Words

means, going to a

gym

Use synonyms

is a remedy for fat

people

Use synonyms

. In conclusion, it seems more reasonable for many

people

Use synonyms

to go to a

gym

Use synonyms

to have excellent physical condition and be a solution for overweight

people

Use synonyms

to be aware.

While

Linking Words

other groups believe that routine

activities

Use synonyms

could be enough and the

gym

Use synonyms

is not reasonable because of financial expenses.

Submitted by TUTOO on Fri Nov 17 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence & Cohesion

Your essay should have a clear logical structure that is easy for the reader to follow. Consider using more explicit paragraphing and signal words to guide the reader through your arguments and ideas. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea and a logical sequence of sentences.

Coherence & Cohesion

Ensure your introduction and conclusion are clearly defined. The introduction should outline the topic and your main points, while the conclusion should summarise these points and restate your opinion. Both should be distinct and clearly present your stance on the issue.

Coherence & Cohesion

Main points should be well-developed and supported with specific examples. In your essay, there were assertions made that lack the supportive detail necessary for a strong argument. Ensure you provide clear examples or evidence to back up each main point.

Task Achievement

You must fully address all parts of the task. The essay prompt asks you to discuss both views and give your own opinion. Make sure that you spend equal amounts of the essay on each view and clearly state your own opinion in the conclusion.

Task Achievement

Your ideas should be clear and comprehensive throughout the essay. While some ideas were present, they could be more thoroughly explained and explored. Work on expanding your points and connect them clearly to the question prompt.

Task Achievement

Include relevant, specific examples to illustrate your ideas. Your essay contained some general examples, but they were not specific enough to effectively support your claims. Aim to provide concrete details that strengthen your arguments.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

382 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
Some people think a job not only provides income but also social life. Others think it is better to develop social life with people you do not work with. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
While it is believed by some that a job contributes to increasing our communication with others, some people claim that it would be better to improve social life with someone out of the working environment. In this essay, both points of view will be illustrated in addition to my opinion.
4
band
In some countries, there has been an increase in the number of parents who educate their children themselves at home instead of sending them to school. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?
Many parents in Vietnam choose to teach their kids at home instead of sending them to school. Some children feel sad because they miss playing with friends, while others are happy to skip homework. I'll explain my thoughts on this topic.
6.5
band
Write an email to a manager hotel expressing a bad experience in a hotel. mention the following points: describe the details of the experience, ask for a compensation somehow and suggest recommendations to improve
I am writing this email to bring your attention to the disafortunate experience during my time at the Hilton Hotel located in Vancouver Downtown.
4.5
band
With the rise in popularity of the internet, newspaper will soon become a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Invention of the internet has brought numerous benefits to the society including increased pace of comminication among people around the world and a chance for more objective and comprehensive information about things are existed somewhere in the earth. At this point there comes a question to the minds: whether newspaper will soon transform into a thing of the past or not. It can be easily stated that internet may provide more well-rounded data about a topic and quicker accessment to the news, so newspaper is likely to turn into an antique item in the future.
7
band
In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between citles. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Nowadays many countries use huge numbers of money to build new railways for super-fast trains. On the other hand, some people think that the government's funds should be used for developing existing public transport. In this essay, I will write both statements and give my opinion related to those statements.

Some people believe that the best way to stay fit is to join aa gym or a health club, while others think doing everyday activities such as walking and climbing stairs is enough. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Your opinion

Some people think a job not only provides income but also social life. Others think it is better to develop social life with people you do not work with. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In some countries, there has been an increase in the number of parents who educate their children themselves at home instead of sending them to school. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Write an email to a manager hotel expressing a bad experience in a hotel. mention the following points: describe the details of the experience, ask for a compensation somehow and suggest recommendations to improve

With the rise in popularity of the internet, newspaper will soon become a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between citles. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.