Some think that people should not change th9eir jobs while others think they should because it brings advantages for themselves, the company and society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Whether
one
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should
change
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their
job
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or not is a matter of argument, as some
people
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believe that we should stick to our current occupation,
while
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others might say that it can be beneficial to
change
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our career when it is necessary. I am among those who agree with the latter viewpoint because of the beneficial aspects of changing jobs.
People
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who claim that an individual should avoid changing their
job
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are of the opinion that
this
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change
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could be considered
as
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apply
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a waste of
time
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. They say the amount of
time
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and energy which might be consumed in order to make a
change
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in
one
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's profession can be spent more efficiently to achieve a career progression in their current
job
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position.
This
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could be much better for them because
this
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can help their income to improve in a shorter period of
time
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and bring them
a
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apply
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job
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satisfaction
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,
as a result
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. On the other side of
this
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argument, many professionals believe that having a
job
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which does not suit a person could have some destructive consequences with regard to their mental health
such
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as depression.
People
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spend a great proportion of their
time
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in their working environment, so having a career that can bring us
job
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satisfaction
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could be essential for having a joyful life.
For instance
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, many professionals in the field of medicine like dentists and general surgeons have
witnessed to be
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been
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suffering from depression despite the high amount of income they have, and
that is
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caused by the lack of
job
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satisfaction
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. I believe that the former viewpoint that discourage
people
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from changing their
job
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, tend to ignore the impacts of
one
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's aptitude and interests in a specific field. Without these features, there is no guarantee that even if someone decides to stay in their current
job
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, they can manage to enhance the situation by achieving a promotion.
Consequently
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, they will waste their
time
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and energy more than the amount needed to make a
change
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. In conclusion, changing careers could be a necessity in
one
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's life, especially when the lack of
satisfaction
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is notable. If we try to stick to our current position just because of the fear of losing some
time
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and money, there is a great chance that we face consequences like being depressed.
Submitted by greatsoloist on

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coherence cohesion
You exhibit good control over the structure of your essay with clear paragraphs, each presenting a distinct viewpoint. Continue to maintain logical paragraphing and clear topic sentences to guide the reader through your argument.
coherence cohesion
While your introduction and conclusion are present and clearly state the essay's position, ensure that they are also succinct yet informative. This could help in making a stronger immediate impact on the reader.
coherence cohesion
Support your main points with more varied and detailed examples. Doing so will ground your arguments and make them more persuasive. Try to include references to studies or statistics where possible.
task achievement
You successfully address all parts of the task, showing an understanding of the topic and presenting a balanced discussion. Be careful to maintain this balance to avoid skewing towards one viewpoint without sufficient exploration of the other.
task achievement
You present your ideas clearly, but can strive for greater clarity by avoiding overly complex sentence structures or less common vocabulary that might distract from your argument.
task achievement
Incorporate more specific examples and evidence to support your claims. This can include personal anecdotes, statistical data, or referencing real-world scenarios, which will help in convincingly conveying your perspective.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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