Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situationsuch as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

#people #situationsuch #job #shortage #money #situations

Some believe that we have

Fix the infinitive

to accept

show examples

our bad situation as it is

while

others want to

change

that situation by working on that

proble

Correct your spelling

problem

. In my

opinion

Add a comma

opinion,

show examples

belive

Correct your spelling

believe

show examples

if anything bad

happen

Change the verb form

happens

show examples

, we can

change

that with our action.

Firstly

, if we

are

Verb problem

have

show examples

having

job

which

Change preposition

with which

show examples

don't

Verb problem

are not

show examples

satisfied

then

better to look for

the

Correct article usage

show examples

new

job

which means we

didn't

Verb problem

are not

show examples

satisfied from a

job

means the work or

it's

Replace the word

its

show examples

environment

not

Add a missing verb

is not

show examples

as expected.

Therefore

instead

of staying in the same

spot

Add a comma

spot,

show examples

we can

tried

Wrong verb form

try to

show examples

move on by searching

new

Change preposition

for new

show examples

jobs and analysing

the

Remove the article

apply

show examples

each

oportunities

Correct your spelling

opportunity

such

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

their culture, salary and other

benifits

Correct your spelling

benefits

before joining.

This

way we know what we want and choose the correct one to make it better. For

intance

Correct your spelling

instance

, I'm working

Change preposition

for

show examples

a company as a developer but that company's environment and policies

not

Add a missing verb

are not

show examples

suited for me. But, I can choose to

change

my place

instead

Wrong verb form

of accepting

show examples

the current one. By doing that the situation can be better.

Secondly

shortage

Correct article usage

a shortage

show examples

of money comes from not having a proper income or not having money management. It can be changeable too.

For

example

Add a comma

example,

show examples

if my monthly essential expense is more than my income

then

I have to find a way to improve that by finding

new

Add an article

a new

show examples

job

or starting

new

Add an article

a new

show examples

business. At the same

time

Add a comma

time,

show examples

even

Correct word choice

if I

show examples

have enough money

but

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

have not

having

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

proper financial management

also

lead

Correct subject-verb agreement

leads

show examples

this

Change preposition

to this

show examples

problem but it can

Change the verb form

be also changed

show examples

also

change

by avoiding unwanted

expences

Correct your spelling

expenses

show examples

Finally

, whatever reason

Submitted by n_wara11 on Sat Nov 18 2023

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introduction conclusion present

Your essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion which are essential components of the IELTS essay structure. Make sure to include them to present a complete argument.

logical structure

The logical flow of your essay is somewhat disrupted, needing clearer connections and transitions between ideas. Aim to have a more natural progression from one point to the next.

supported main points

You need to develop your supporting points more thoroughly with specific examples and explanations to effectively strengthen your argument.

complete response

The essay appears incomplete and ends abruptly. Ensure to provide a decisive conclusion to summarize your stance on the topic and reinforce your main points.

clear comprehensive ideas

Try to express your ideas more clearly and comprehensively. Elaborate on each point to fully convey your message and make sure it's easily understood.

relevant specific examples

Incorporate relevant and specific examples to illustrate your points. This makes your argument stronger and more persuasive.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
35Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

248 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

unsatisfactory situation
stress
mental health
content outlook
humble outlook
opportunities
personal growth
empowerment
control over one's destiny
proactive problem-solving
innovative solutions
creative thinking
resilience
stronger character

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Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situationsuch as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

More and more tasks we do at home and at work these days are done by robots. Is this a positive and negative development?

Nowadays, more and more people decide to have children later in their life. What are the reasons? Do advantages of this outweigh disadvantages?

In many countries, traditional foods are being replaced by international fast food. This is having a negative effect on both families and societies. To what extent do you agree or disagree

University students always focus on one special subject but some people think university should encourage their students to study a range of subjects. To what extend do you agree or disagree?