Despite a large number of gyms, a sedentary lifestyle is gaining popular in the contemporary world. What problems are associated with this? What solutions can you suggest

Nowadays
people
mostly experience a lifestyle which does not consist
any
Change preposition
of any
show examples
physical movement.
Although
there are plenty
Change preposition
of traning
show examples
traning
Correct your spelling
training
centers
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centres
show examples
in every city or town. One of the biggest problems is an increase in
health
-related issues
due to
luck
Correct your spelling
lack
show examples
of physical activity,
such
as obesity, heart disease, diabetes and mental
health
problems like depression and anxiety. A large number of TV programs recently
is
Wrong verb form
been
show examples
related to
this
topic,
for instance
, a Russian program called "To
live healthy
Correct your spelling
Live Healthy
show examples
is
cool
Capitalize word
Cool
show examples
" discusses the
health
issues of remote workers on one of the main TV channels every day. To solve
this
problem, the
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
should increase the promotion of
benefits
Correct article usage
the benefits
show examples
of
active
Add an article
an active
show examples
lifestyle,
such
as biking and walking as a solution to incorporate exercise
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
a daily routine. Another issue is
Correct article usage
the distabilised
show examples
distabilised
Correct your spelling
destabilised
mental
health
of the
people
and
Correct article usage
the luck
show examples
luck
Correct your spelling
lack
show examples
of real communication. Social consequences like isolation and a decrease in community engagement, as individuals spend more time with screens and less with
people
.
For example
, in
Correct article usage
the porpose
show examples
porpose
Correct your spelling
purpose
of giving their workers more
apportunities
Correct your spelling
opportunities
to communicate, an international English school "Novakid" recently established a new feature, "Novacafe". It is a special place, where teachers can interact with each other. Another way of solving the issue would be the implementation of workplace wellness programs that encourage employees to take regular breaks, stand up, and engage in physical activity. In conclusion,
although
it is clear that
a sedentary lifestyle has a lot of drawbacks, it is undoubtedly possible to start to tackle these issues. Governments and local companies should take the lead in dealing with these problems,
otherwise
Add a comma
otherwise,
show examples
the condition of
people
's
health
will become worse in the future.
Submitted by t-staro on

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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
Develop main points with more detailed explanations and a wider range of supporting examples. The examples provided should be clearly relevant to the topic and argument being made.
task achievement
Ensure your response fully addresses all parts of the task. Give equal attention to the problems associated with a sedentary lifestyle and the potential solutions.
task achievement
Clarify and expand on your ideas to ensure they are comprehensive and fully developed. Avoid presenting superficial statements that lack depth.
task achievement
Use more specific and detailed examples to underpin your arguments. Avoid vague references and ensure examples are directly connected to the points being made.

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • sedentary lifestyle
  • contemporary world
  • physical inactivity
  • chronic diseases
  • mental wellbeing
  • healthcare expenditure
  • active transport
  • workplace wellness
  • community engagement
  • public infrastructure
  • preventative measures
  • holistic health
  • exercise regimen
  • nutritional awareness
  • government initiatives
  • public health campaigns
  • screen time
  • lifestyle modification
  • social connectedness
  • educational programs
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