IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The graph below gives information about Dubai gold sales in 2002. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below gives information about Dubai gold sales in 2002. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#information #dubai #gold #sales #summarise #features #comparisons
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The diagram illustrates the difference
of
Change preposition
in of
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 sales
Gold
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 in
Dubai
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 throughout the month
in
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of
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 2002,
Overall
Linking Words
, the amount of
Dubai
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Gold
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 sold fluctuated with the highest peak in March with 300 million
of
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apply
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dirhams
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 and the lowest in July and September with 100
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millions
Fix the agreement mistake
million
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of
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apply
show examples
Dirhams
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 There are 4 main trends in the
afford-mentioned
Correct your spelling
above-mentioned
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 chart .
Firstly
Linking Words
, the data of products of
Dubai
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gold
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 significantly increased and
peak
Wrong verb form
peaked
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 at 350
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millions
Change to singular
million
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dirhams
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 in the first three months.
Secondly
Linking Words
, there
are
Wrong verb form
was
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 a substanly
decreased
Replace the word
decrease
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 from 350 to 110
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millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
dirhams
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 in July. After that, from July to October the index of sales of
Dubai
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gold
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 fluctuated from 110 to 190
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millions
Fix the agreement mistake
million
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of
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apply
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dirhams
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.
Finally
Linking Words
, the total of
Dubai
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gold
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 outputs remained steady
in
Change the preposition
at
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 the end of the period.
Submitted by teachingqa272 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words gold, dubai, dirhams, millions with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "fluctuated" was used 2 times.
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