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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some cities have vehicle-free days when private cars, trucks and motorcycles are banned from the city centre. People are encouraged to use public transportation such as buses, taxis and metro on vehicle-free days. To what extent do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

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It is observed that the vehicles including private
cars
 and motorcycles are proscribed on particular days in many cities.
This
 essay will demonstrate the merits of
this
 phenomenon can partly supersede its demerits.
To begin
 with, there are some reasons why the ban on private
cars
 is disadvantageous. For one thing, it provides citizens with an inconvenience inasmuch as they cannot directly reach
to
Change preposition
apply
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the destination with their
cars
. If driving
cars
 is prohibited, they might have to unnecessarily transfer in order to go to the same place, using public transportation.
Furthermore
, there could be some people who live in the region where it is hard to access
to
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apply
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public transit. In spite of the reason mentioned above, I support the notion that the implementation of vehicle-free days has more upper hand. One of the main reasons for
this
 contention is that it has positive effects on
alleviate
Wrong verb form
alleviating
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 air pollution. The emission of carbon dioxide can dwindle because of the restraint of driving private
cars
.
For example
, unless people use buses and subways which can accommodate hundreds of commuters, there are hundreds of
cars
 on the street which give off fumes.
Secondly
,
this
 scheme can solve the traffic congestion, reducing the number of driven
cars
. People cannot only get
faster
Correct word choice
apply
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to
the
Change the word
their
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 destination but
also
 enjoy the less crowded city as long as the dense traffic diminishes. In a nutshell, considering all these reasons,
it is clear that
,
although
 there are a few downsides to the restriction of private
cars
, the benefits seem to outbalance the disadvantages.
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task achievement
Make sure to fully address the prompt by exploring both advantages and disadvantages. Your conclusion must summarise both sides and clearly state your position, showing that one side outweighs the other.
coherence cohesion
Your essay should demonstrate a clear logical structure with well-organized paragraphs. Each main point must be elaborated distinctly. Use a variety of cohesive devices and transition words to enhance the flow of information between paragraphs.
task achievement
Illustrate your main points with specific examples. The examples should be clearly related to the topic and your arguments to help strengthen your points. Aim for relevance and specificity, possibly by citing concrete statistics or real-life instances that back your claims.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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