Scientists believe that in order to protect the environment, people must use less energy in their daily lives. However, most people have not changed the way they live. Why do you think many people have not taken individual action? What could be done to encourage them to take action?
In
this
modern era, usage
of fossil fuels or gasses should be reduced in Correct article usage
the usage
day to day
life as per the researchers but half of the population is not aware of the negative effects of using these Add a hyphen
day-to-day
engery
Correct your spelling
energy
sources
and there are various reasons that no individual steps are taken to reduce this
. Thus
, there are various remedies available to solve this
problem, which will be mentioned in the upcoming paragraphs.
There are various reasons that society is still dependent on these old energy
sources
and the prominent one is that most of the people
in community
are unaware of the other Add an article
the community
sources
such
as the use of electrical heaters needs to eliminated
as they generate a lot of detrimental gasses that Add a missing verb
be eliminated
effect
health badly, Correct your spelling
affect
instead
solar pannels
can be the best source of heat generation in the houses. Correct your spelling
panels
Furthermore
, most of
Change preposition
apply
the
nations are hit by inflation nowadays because of which it is extremely hard for the commoners to shift to electric cars from Correct article usage
apply
the
fuel cars as cars that run on power like Tesla are really expensive and are totally out of the reach of common Correct article usage
apply
people
. While
,
the vehicles Remove the comma
apply
those
run on Correct pronoun usage
that
diseal
and patrol are cheaper Correct your spelling
diesel
but
they are Correct word choice
apply
biggest
danger to the surrounding. Change the article
the biggest
Hence
, it is apparent why many person
Change to a plural noun
people
are
yet not moved from the use of Verb problem
have
energy
sources
.
Steps to deal with this
mence
are many but the most significant one is that society needs to gain the Correct your spelling
menace
awarness
regarding the harmful effects of Correct your spelling
awareness
energy
fuels. Moreover
, the executives can play vital
role here by conducting some Add an article
a vital
awarness
campaigns Correct your spelling
awareness
montly
. Correct your spelling
monthly
Besides
this
, either the government can provide loan
to common Fix the agreement mistake
loans
people
at afforedable
interest rates or rulers can help Correct your spelling
affordable
people
by increasing their incomes even just a
$1 after every hour could prove to be Correct article usage
apply
good
help.
Add an article
a good
According to
the arguments afforementioned
above , one can reach to logical conclusion that the problem of reduction Correct your spelling
aforementioned
on
Change preposition
in
use
of Add an article
the use
energy
resources can be successfully addressed, provided that above stated
measures are taken.Correct your spelling
above-stated
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Coherence and Cohesion
The essay lacks clear and coherent structure, making it difficult for the reader to follow the argument. There is some attempt at an introduction and conclusion, but the main points are not clearly developed or supported with specific examples or evidence.
Task Achievement
The response partially addresses the task, but the explanations and arguments are not fully extended or well supported. The answer lacks depth and does not fully explain why people have not changed their energy usage habits nor does it robustly explore potential solutions. There should be clear, comprehensive ideas supported with relevant, specific examples.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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