hese days, many people have their own computer and telephone, so it is quite easy for them to do their job at home. Does working at home have more advantages or more disadvantages?
There
is
a noticeable increase in the number of people working from home in recent times, largely Wrong verb form
has been
due to
the widespread ownership of computers and mobile phones. While
this
trend has the potential to improve the work
-life balance for many individuals, it could also
lead to a rise in global mental health
crises. Despite the potential disadvantages, I am of the opinion that the benefits of working from home outweigh the drawbacks.
For decades, workers have grappled with balancing their jobs and personal lives due to
the high time demands of various professions. The extensive working hours often result in reduced energy and minimal time for personal interests, impacting the health
and well-being of individuals. Working from one's personal space not only creates flexibility in personal lives
but Fix the agreement mistake
life
also
enhances productivity at work
.
However
, the impact of remote work
on mental health
cannot be ignored. There could be a surge in global mental health
issues such
as depression, anxiety, and alcoholism in the future due to
fewer social interactions and human contact. The result of this
could be a decrease in work
output, potentially endangering the global economy.
The last
few decades have witnessed a paradigm shift in the way we work
, including the option to work
from our computers and mobile phones in the comfort of our homes. While
there is a significant impact on family and personal lives, one cannot simply ignore the potential negative effects on the mental health
of certain individuals. It is crucial to strike a balance between the advantages and disadvantages of working from home to ensure a sustainable and healthy work
environment.Submitted by lolaadeoje on
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Coherence and Cohesion
You should ensure you have a clear and logical structure throughout your essay. Each paragraph should flow coherently into the next, with a clear progression of ideas. Transition words and phrases can help to achieve this. Your essay shows some elements of structure, but this can be improved for greater clarity.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present but could be more impactful. The introduction should clearly state the main points that you will discuss in your essay, and the conclusion should succinctly summarise these points and reaffirm your stance on the topic. Aim to make a stronger impression in these critical sections of your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
When supporting your main points, use specific examples that directly relate to the topic. This will strengthen your arguments and demonstrate a deeper understanding of the subject. Your essay provides general statements but lacks detailed illustrations that could enhance your arguments.
Task Achievement
You have responded to the task partially; however, a more complete response is required. Your opinion is stated but you need to fully develop all parts of the prompt in a balanced way. This includes discussing the advantages and disadvantages equally if asked to evaluate both, with a clear opinion expressed.
Task Achievement
Your ideas are fairly clear and comprehensive, but to achieve a higher score, aim to fully develop and elaborate on these ideas with more depth. Providing a detailed exploration of both sides of the argument will result in a more comprehensive discussion of the topic.
Task Achievement
You should make sure to use relevant and specific examples to illustrate your points. Doing so helps to substantiate your claims and shows that you can apply your thoughts practically. Including such examples makes your essay more convincing and complete, which is particularly important in the context of IELTS Task 2 essays.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.