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Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people say that completing University education is the best way to get a job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills are important Discuss both sides and give your opinion

#people #university #education #job #hand #skills
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In recent years, there have been a few
people
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 who argue that pursuing higher education can help
people
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 to have jobs in the future.
On the other hand
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, some
people
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 prioritize experiences as a main factor to gain jobs. As
such
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, I will discuss both sides,
although
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 I opine that complete education will benefit
people
Use synonyms
's future. In
this
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 essay, I will examine all the relevant arguments based on factual premises. Nowadays, obtaining a job requires a university certificate;
therefore
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, parents will force their children to gain a certificate. It helps them not just get a job but
also
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 have numerous choices with higher salaries.
Moreover
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,
people
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 can build connections that might be used for them
while
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 improving their knowledge.
In addition
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, meeting numerous
people
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 with different backgrounds; will broaden their minds and knowledge.
However
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, there are a few jobs that do not need certificates, experiences are more important.
Moreover
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, developing soft skills is cheaper than university costs;
therefore
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, students do not burden themselves because of loans.
Furthermore
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, they can not earn money for 3 or 4 years which makes it more difficult to pay the debt. In conclusion, gaining knowledge in university is important.
Nevertheless
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, having experiences that the company needs, sometimes makes it easier to have a job.
However
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, all of
this
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 depends on the career that we want.
Submitted by gladysdharmawan1994 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure the essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion structure. The introduction should outline the main points, the body should expand on these points with clear paragraphs, and the conclusion should succinctly summarize the argument and your opinion.
coherence cohesion
Use a range of cohesive devices appropriately to link ideas and paragraphs together for better readability. This includes conjunctions, discourse markers, and referencing words.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to fully develop each main point with relevant explanations and examples, maintaining the focus on the task throughout the essay.
task achievement
Fully address all parts of the task, providing a clear response to the question with well-developed ideas and relevant examples.
task achievement
Provide a balance of ideas for both sides of the argument and include a clear stated personal opinion with justifications.
task achievement
Use specific examples to support arguments and provide evidence for the claims you make, which will make your response more convincing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • structured learning
  • theoretical knowledge
  • academic credentials
  • networking opportunities
  • real-world application
  • problem-solving
  • teamwork
  • communication skills
  • adaptability
  • internships
  • apprenticeships
  • professional development
  • entrepreneurship
  • long-term career success
  • industries
  • fields
  • balance
  • foundation
  • cultivation
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