Nowadays, more and more people move to live in big cities. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
In the present time, most
community
prefer to migrate from rural to urban for several reasons. Change to a plural noun
communities
However
, these people
faced sometimes problems when they live in the cities. In this
essay, I will mention the advantages and disadvantages of living in a big city
.
In the beginning, there are many advantages of living in urban. Firstly
, the services in the city
are available unlike in the mountains and life becomes easier. For example
, the quality of building and roads are better. Also
, the chance of learning is more
because there are schools and universities. Correct word choice
higher
In addition
, people
have a lot of means of entertainment like shopping, restaurants and a gym. Secondly
, cultural diversity spreads in place because the people
come from different area
and Fix the agreement mistake
areas
this
makes them learn from others. For instance
, people
can learn the language and change their thinking when they learn from other people
.
On the other hand
, there is a negative thing when they live in cities. The biggest problem is the increase in population and this
leads to many bad things such
as pollution and noise and this
affects human healthy, on the contrary
, people
who live in the rural find them healthier. The second disadvantage is the waste of money because life city
is more expensive and we need to spend more money. For example
, people
want to enjoy and eat fast food from restaurants and go to the gym every day because they do not have other activities to do in the city
.
In conclusion, the thinking of people
is different where you can find some people
prefer to live in a ruarl and some of them prefer live
in the Fix the infinitive
to live
city
each one has a different view but in reality, the advantage of living in city
is more than when live in the mountain.Add an article
the city
a city
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introduction conclusion present
Your essay provides a basic structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the introduction and conclusion could be more developed to clearly state your position on whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. Make sure both are fully elaborated to guide the reader through your argument effectively.
logical structure
The essay has a recognizable logical structure, with separate paragraphs for advantages and disadvantages. However, transitions between ideas could be smoother and more varied. Aim to link sentences and paragraphs with cohesive devices that show comparison, contrast, cause and effect, or sequence.
supported main points
You provided some support for your main points, but the examples and explanations can be fleshed out further. Try to give specific, detailed examples that directly illustrate your arguments. This will make your essay more persuasive and show a deeper level of analysis.
complete response
Your response partially addresses the task. Be sure to directly answer the question of whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages by making a clear argument and drawing a conclusion that reflects this comparison throughout the essay.
clear comprehensive ideas
Your ideas are comprehensible, but at times they lack clarity and depth. Aim for precision in your language and develop your ideas fully. Avoid general statements and make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea that is expanded with detailed supporting information.
relevant specific examples
The use of examples is a good start, but they need to be more relevant and specific to support your argument effectively. Focus on quality rather than quantity by selecting one or two strong examples per advantage/disadvantage and explain their importance in the context of your argument.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.
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