IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Most people believe that stricter punishments should be given for traffic offences. To which extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #punishments #traffic #offences
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Advocates for harsher
penalties
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 often argue that they act as a strong
deterrent
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, dissuading individuals from engaging in risky
behavior
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behaviour
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while
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 driving. They argue that increasing fines, license suspensions, or implementing stricter
penalties
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 like community service or imprisonment can
instill
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instil
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 a greater sense of responsibility among drivers, ultimately reducing
traffic
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 violations and
accidents
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.
However
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, solely relying on punitive measures may not address the root causes of
traffic
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offenses
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offences
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 effectively.
Instead
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, a comprehensive approach involving
education
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 and awareness campaigns is equally crucial.
Education
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 plays a pivotal role in fostering a culture of responsible driving. Promoting awareness about road
safety
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,
the
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and the
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 consequences of reckless driving, and providing driver
education
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 programs can have a significant impact on behavior.
Moreover
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, improving
infrastructure
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 and implementing better
traffic
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 management systems are integral to enhancing
safety
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 on the roads. Investing in well-designed roads, efficient
traffic
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 signals, pedestrian crossings, and
infrastructure
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 for cyclists can contribute to reducing
accidents
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 and violations. Creating an environment that prioritizes
safety
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 through better
infrastructure
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 complements punitive measures by preventing
accidents
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 from occurring in the first place. Another consideration is the consistency and fairness in implementing stricter
penalties
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.
While
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penalties
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 may serve as a
deterrent
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, their effectiveness depends on consistent
enforcement
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 and the perceived fairness of the punishment. Unequal
enforcement
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 or leniency can undermine the
deterrent
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 effect. In my view, a balanced approach that combines stricter
penalties
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 with
education
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, improved
infrastructure
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, and consistent
enforcement
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 is more effective in promoting road
safety
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. Stricter punishments can serve as a
deterrent
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, but they should be complemented by proactive measures that address the underlying causes of
traffic
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 violations and
accidents
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. In conclusion,
while
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 there are merits to the argument for stricter punishments for
traffic
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offenses
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offences
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, a more comprehensive approach encompassing
education
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,
infrastructure
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 improvements, and consistent
enforcement
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 is vital.
Such
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 a multifaceted strategy is more likely to foster a culture of responsible driving and create safer roads for everyone.
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introduction conclusion present
Ensure that your introduction and conclusion are both clear and succinct, directly addressing the essay topic. While your introduction sets the stage for your arguments, the conclusion should decisively summarize your viewpoint, leaving no room for ambiguity.
logical structure
Develop a more robust logical structure in your essay. Use linking words and phrases to clearly connect your ideas and arguments. This will enhance the flow and make it easier for the reader to follow your train of thought.
supported main points
Provide more detailed examples and evidence to support each main point. By incorporating relevant data or real-world scenarios, your arguments can be substantiated and better convince the reader of your position.
complete response
To fully satisfy the task requirements, ensure that your essay comprehensively addresses the prompt with a clear line of argument throughout. Maintain focus on the question posed and ensure that all parts of your response contribute to answering it.
clear comprehensive ideas
Sustain the clarity of thought and breadth of ideas throughout the essay. Continue to express comprehensive ideas and develop them with detail, as this demonstrates a depth of understanding and allows for a nuanced discussion of the topic.
relevant specific examples
Further enhance your task achievement by including more concrete examples that are directly relevant to your arguments. This will not only strengthen your position but also demonstrate your ability to relate your ideas to real-world situations, a crucial aspect of the task.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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