Young people are much more aware of and concerned about issues like the environment, poverty, and animal welfare than previous generations. What is your own opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Nowadays, the youth generations are more keen and perceptive toward several affairs
such
as those concerning the environment
, poverty level, and animal protection in comparison to their preceding age groups. In my opinion, I agree that many of the younger people
have a bigger interest for
the mentioned topics. In Change preposition
in
this
essay, I will dissect the reasons behind them from my own experiences and views.
To start with, the environment
is currently one of the most discussed topics throughout social media due to
the statements of many scientists posted on many platforms about the possibly
emerging climate change. Change the word
possible
Consequently
, this
planted worries and concerns of
the coming climate change in the youth’s minds, evidenced by the emergence of various Change preposition
about
environment
and go green
awareness campaigns. One of the possible Add a hyphen
go-green
reason
that made the youths to be more concerned about Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
this
affair is based on how they are the generation that will live the impact in their later stage of life. Meanwhile, the older generations are not as worried because some of them feel that they won’t live long enough to be affected by the adverse impact, even though they are the one who has done more exploitations
Fix the agreement mistake
exploitation
to
the Change preposition
of
environment
.
The next discourse that is
also
very popular is the attention towards the poor and financially unstable group of people
. For example
, the birth of various donation and social welfare start-up companies such
as KitaBisa and campaign.com are enabling a considerable amount of people
to be a fundraiser. As a result
, many young people
are now helping unfortunate people
around them, such
as their neighbors
that Change the spelling
neighbours
does
not have the resource and exposure to get help by simply posting the Change the verb form
do
persons
background and Change noun form
person's
purpose
of the donations. Simultaneously, the new platform Correct article usage
the purpose
also
help
to ease the hassle for someone to donate their money Change the verb form
helps
for
others.
Change preposition
to
Lastly
, concerns regarding animal welfare and how to stop the abuse towards them are becoming more apparent throughout
Change preposition
among
the
youngsters Correct article usage
apply
due to
the function of social media that enables people
to record and upload any recordings to their account
. To illustrate, there are accounts made to seek and expose the perpetrator of animal abuse through the uploading of Fix the agreement mistake
accounts
the
recordings to give them social pressure and punishment. Correct article usage
apply
Due to
the scale of the account, the persecution of the perpetrator can be quite harsh, often resulting in the animal abuser losing their job position. However
, these accounts have raised the
awareness of how we should take care of other living creatures.
Correct article usage
apply
To conclude
, the presented examples showed backgrounds and catalysts of how the young generations are more aware of environmental, people
, and animal welfare issues. It can be seen that what has been the catalyst for the surging awareness of the mentioned affairs above have similarities in terms of how the emergence of new mediums of information and platforms, enabled by the advancement of technologies are
what enabled younger Change the verb form
is
people
to have the opportunity to be more aware and act for the issues that they gravitate towards.Submitted by febrinhidayat on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea, which is then developed and supported by specific evidence or examples. The use of more specific data or statistics could strengthen the essay's arguments.
task achievement
The essay should consistently maintain a formal tone, avoiding any colloquial language or contractions to adhere to the expected academic writing style for IELTS. Review your essay for any informal expressions.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example