Schools are no longer needed because students could fine so much information on the Internet and study at home. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#schools #students #information #internet #study #home

A set of people believe that

schools

are no longer needed because

students

can find a lot of information on the Internet.

In contrast

, in my point of view,

schools

are not irreplaceable by others.

This

essay is going to clarify these perspectives.

Firstly

, direct interaction in

schools

is always an important aspect. Offline classes can help to improve the communication between

students

and teachers, developing

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

relationship

Fix the agreement mistake

relationships

show examples

with other

students

For example

, in

academy

Add an article

the academy

show examples

, people can interact with others based on a number of methods

such

as eye contact, hand gestures, voices and other body language.

Accordingly

students

in offline classes easily absorb knowledge.

Moreover

, direct interaction can

also

help to build teamwork skill and communication

skill

Fix the agreement mistake

skills

show examples

which has major support to the future career.

Secondly

schools

are always trusted

sources

For instance

, a

bachelor

Change noun form

bachelor's

show examples

certificate is the minimum requirement for teachers in primary

schools

, and a college certificate is

Correct article usage

the

show examples

minimum requirement for teachers in preschools.

Therefore

learners

can solve their issues quickly by asking

this

reliable source.

In addition

learners

can easily follow the study path because of the professional

sources

schools

which have made

Correct your spelling

show examples

suitable almost

learners

On the other hand

, some people assume that

schools

are no longer needed because of the diverse

sources

of data on the internet.

However

this

origin is not always true because the knowledge in

this

can be generated from anyone.

For example

, blog posts often show personal views and the bloggers can be a master or not.

Hence

learners

may be confused when

following

this

source.

Consequently

this

source may not capture the full truth and it can not irreplaceable the

schools

Change to a genitive case

school's

schools'

show examples

position. In conclusion, there are many exclusive benefits of learning in

schools

such

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

reliable and trusted

sources

of material,

Correct word choice

and improved

show examples

improved

Change the form of the verb

improving

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

effective

Change preposition

apply

show examples

communication. We should keep forward

this

type of learning to the future.

Submitted by huong.bx on Wed Nov 22 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

Ensure the introduction clearly presents the topic and your position, providing a brief outline of what will be discussed.

coherence cohesion

Focus on logical paragraph structure; each paragraph should have a clear main idea and a series of supporting sentences.

coherence cohesion

Use a wide range of linking words to improve the flow of your essay.

task achievement

Address all parts of the task and make sure your position is relevant to the question and supported throughout your essay.

task achievement

Develop your ideas fully by providing clear, comprehensive explanations and relevant examples.

task achievement

Be cautious with grammatical errors and ensure subject-verb agreement, correct tense usage, and accurate vocabulary.

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17Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

312 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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