Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

#university #students #subjects #addition #time #attention #qualification

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Most

students

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aim to enhance their

capabilities

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by exploring

subjects

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beyond their major at the

university

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On the other hand

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, some argue that it is crucial for

students

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to concentrate their time on the main

subjects

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at the

university

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as a qualification before obtaining a

graduate

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degree. In

this

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essay, I will discuss both views regarding

students

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fulfilling their

capabilities

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outside of the main subject and the importance of learning mandatory

subjects

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at the

university

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Students

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need to study additional

subjects

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on top of the mandatory campus

subjects

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This

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is essential to enhance their

skills

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and

knowledge

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beyond their major.

Moreover

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, other

capabilities

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such

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as soft

skills

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and practical

knowledge

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, are crucial before entering the workplace.

For instance

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, learning about soft

skills

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like presentation or interviewing may not be provided by the

university

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However

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, these

capabilities

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are vital for

graduate

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students

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as they enter the workforce.

Furthermore

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graduate

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students

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from the

university

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have already acquired

skills

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and

knowledge

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during their academic journey.

Nevertheless

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, there are requirements for

students

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fulfill

Change the spelling

fulfil

show examples

these

capabilities

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outside of their main subject.

Firstly

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, they must successfully pass the mandatory

subjects

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at the

university

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Due to

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the

university

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's minimum requirements,

students

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must pass specific

subjects

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before obtaining their

graduate

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degree.

Secondly

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students

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who are allowed to explore other

subjects

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might already be in their final year.

Last

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but not least, the

skills

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and

knowledge

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required in the workplace are based on

university

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programs, specifically the mandatory

subjects

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provided by the

university

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throughout their academic studies.

This

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knowledge

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and these

skills

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will assist them in solving workplace problems effectively. In summary,

students

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who study

subjects

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outside of their main discipline are granted the opportunity to enhance their

skills

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, including soft

skills

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, before entering the workforce.

Furthermore

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, universities have mandatory

subjects

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that all

students

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must pass, which is essential for meeting requirements before obtaining a

graduate

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degree.

Submitted by haloalwan on Thu Nov 23 2023

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Task Achievement

Your essay tends to generalize rather than examining specific points in depth and sometimes repeats ideas. To improve task achievement, try to develop your arguments by providing more precise and varied examples. This will ensure a more complete response to the question.

Coherence and Cohesion

Your writing shows an attempt to organize ideas logically. However, to reach a higher band for coherence and cohesion, it's imperative to structure the essay more effectively. Use clear and distinct topic sentences for each paragraph and ensure that the flow between ideas is smoother. Connectives should be used to demonstrate clear relationships between points.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
7
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

309 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Broaden
Perspectives
Specialize
Critical thinking
Problem-solving skills
Career success
Interdisciplinary connections
Structured path
Clear goals
Creativity
Innovation
Academic credibility
Recognition
Balance
Exploring

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