Many teenagers are encouraged by their parents to get a part-time job. What are the advantages and disadvantages of teenagers working part-time?

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Several parents forced their teenage children to take part in part-time jobs.

This

essay will explain the advantages and disadvantages of teenagers applying for a job. On the one hand, freelance jobs will gain more experience for youngsters than others who do not. With their involvement in some project opportunities, they will find out how to communicate with others.

For instance

, they will face many new people both their clients and employers that will encourage them to prepare before they talk.

As a result

, they are resorted to becoming well-communicated.

However

, the busy time will be disturbing them. Despite

this

, they have many activities that are more important than

work

Firstly

, their liability is to study in

school

insist them to focus on learning the subjects. Nowadays, enrolling in college requires a scholastic test. Rather than working, they must learn the basic knowledge in

school

to continue their academic careers at the university.

Secondly

, rather than being employers, youngsters may join some organizations that engage in social life. Most social organizations are free to join, and teenagers may acquire many friends and connections same as a part-time job.

Furthermore

, joining the volunteering program is the beginning of teenagers facing

work

ambiance

Change the spelling

ambience

show examples

before signing up as an employee. In conclusion, the young society are resorted by their parents to

work

freelance which brings many new opportunities for them.

In contrast

, it will disturb their responsibility to study in

school

. Youngsters may focus on

school

or join some social organization that provides many benefits as same as

work

Submitted by re.li on Thu Nov 23 2023

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Coherence & Cohesion

To improve your logical structure, ensure that each paragraph clearly follows from the previous one and that all paragraphs are linked in a way that supports your overall argument. Use cohesive devices to help sequence information and ideas, but be careful not to overuse them.

Coherence & Cohesion

An introduction and conclusion are present, but they could be improved by making your thesis statement more specific and by ensuring that the conclusion effectively summarizes the main points raised in the essay without introducing new information.

Coherence & Cohesion

To enhance the support for your main points, try to provide more detailed examples and evidence. Each point you make should be backed up by specific information that demonstrates your understanding of the issue and strengthens your argument.

Task Achievement

While you have provided a complete response to the prompt, aim to explore each side of the argument more fully to show a balanced perspective. Acknowledge the complexity of the issue by considering multiple viewpoints and providing nuanced arguments.

Task Achievement

Strive for clearer, more comprehensive ideas by unpacking each point more thoroughly. Consider how you can expand upon each advantage and disadvantage with more depth and clarity to give the reader a better understanding of the implications of teenage part-time work.

Task Achievement

Your essay should include relevant and specific examples to enhance your arguments. These examples should be directly connected to the topic and serve to illustrate the points made in the essay. Including real-life scenarios or substantiated hypotheticals can greatly strengthen your writing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

256 words

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Many teenagers are encouraged by their parents to get a part-time job. What are the advantages and disadvantages of teenagers working part-time?

Fully explain your ideas

Many young children have unsupervised access to the internet and are using the internet to socialize with others. What problems do children face when going online without parental supervision? How can these problems be solved?

There is a trend of increasing amounts of consumer goods, which leads to environmental problems. What are the reasons for this trend? Give your own opinion and solutions.

Some people say that there is too much harmful content on the internet. They say the only way to make the internet safe is for the government to censor the content of websites. To what extent do you think the government should control what information is available on the internet?

Some people think young people should be required to have full time education until they are at least 18 years old. To what extent do you agree or disagree?