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Writing Samples
Band 8

More and more students choose to move to other countries to study their higher education. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh its disadvantages?

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It has become a current trend that the number of those who decide to study abroad increases. I believe there are more benefits than drawbacks ,
for
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to

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 diverse knowledge and skills regardless of some potential feeling of isolation from family and friends. On one hand, the experience of higher education in foreign nations will bring more positive outcomes since students are able to gain more different understanding and techniques that cannot be obtained
otherwise
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

.
In other words
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, it will become
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 a stimulating moment that they learn in an unfamiliar way.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, I was expected to work more interactively and cooperatively with teachers and other classmates during my stay in the U.S.
while
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 I was only required to listen to lectures and take notes in Japan.
Therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,I was more encouraged to externalize my opinions to deepen my understanding in the form of speech and discussion, which led to the dramatic improvement of communication skills that are critical for problem-solving.
On the other hand
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, studying in different countries can cause some negative consequences
due to
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 the growing sense of loneliness. Indeed, being apart from family and friends can lead to their emotional instability. As they lack emotional support, they often suffer from an overwhelming sense of confusion and anxiety when dealing with language barriers and cultural differences.
Consequently
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, they will lose their confidence and not concentrate on their study, which can result in their deteriorating academic performance. In conclusion, the benefits of studying abroad surpass the negative aspects since students are encouraged to acquire various skills and knowledge in a more dynamic way.
Thus
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, it will become a valuable learning experience in spite of some emotional gaps in adapting to an unfamiliar environment of education.

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Coherence & Cohesion
Try to vary your sentence structure more to enhance readability and engage the reader.
Task Achievement
Include a wider range of vocabulary specific to the topic of studying abroad to demonstrate a broader linguistic range.
Task Achievement
For an even stronger essay, consider adding a short paragraph discussing how the disadvantages could be mitigated or why they are outweighed by the advantages in more depth.
Logical Structure
You have a well-structured essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion that address the prompt effectively.
Supported Main Points
Solid examples are used to support your points, making your argument persuasive and grounded.
Complete Response
Your essay clearly outlines both sides of the argument, providing a balanced view before concluding on your stance.
Introduction & Conclusion Present
You've effectively utilized cohesive devices to link ideas and paragraphs, ensuring the essay flows smoothly.
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