Q: Shopping habits depend more on your age group than anything else. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
The age group is said to influence more about
someone
's shopping habits. I disagree with this
statement because there are others such
as society
or even the convenience of online shopping might affect more on
that Rephrase
apply
habit
rather than age group.
First and foremost, a Circle of friends or society
can influence someone
's habit
in terms of shopping. Fix the agreement mistake
habits
This
is because people
tend to follow the way society
behaves or their friends' lifestyles and if the circle tend to spend a lot of money buying new stuff, it will automatically change the person's lifestyle as well to become a big spender. For example
, The feeling of being left out is proven as the most crucial factor that explains someone
's habit
of spending money on luxury stuff. This
is actually happening in South Korea as it was nominated as the country with the biggest spending on luxury brands. This
is because their citizens are afraid of being left out in the society
. Thus
, this
explains why the role of society
is influential in changing someone
's habit
.
Nowadays, there are more ways to do shopping, rather than visiting the store like usual, Fix the agreement mistake
habits
people
are more opt to shop using online platforms such
as Amazon, Shopee, or Alibaba. Not only it
offer a convenient way to shop, but it Add a missing verb
does it
also
can lead to impulsive buying. For instance
, people
spend a lot of their time in front of their gadgets and sometimes people
are attracted to browsing online shops. Thus
, it will cause a person to buy stuff that they actually not
need. Add a missing verb
do not
This
convenient way to shop might cause people
to become impulsive and have a habit
of spending big amounts on shopping online.
In conclusion, The
age group is not the most crucial factor in affecting Correct article usage
apply
someone
's spending habits. Other factors such
as society
or the existence of online shopping can be said to be the crucial point in changing someone
's habits.Submitted by lavenia34808 on
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coherence cohesion
Make sure to structure your essay with a clear introduction, distinct main body paragraphs, and a concise conclusion. Each paragraph should have a clear central idea and logically flow from one to the other.
task achievement
Introduce your essay with a strong thesis statement outlining your position clearly. Ensure each paragraph reinforces this position, and conclude your essay with a summarising statement that reflects back on the thesis and the arguments you've presented.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite