In many countries traditional foods are being replaced by international fast foods.This is having a negative effects on both families and societies. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

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No one can deny that international fast
foods
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are constantly on the rise in many countries. Even
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the locals
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locals population
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local populations
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are enjoying international
foods
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more than traditional
foods
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. In
this
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paragraph , I totally agree that
this
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will lead to negative effects on both families and societies in health implications,
as well as
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on environmental concerns.
Firstly
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, junk
food
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made with high calories , fat and sugar is harmful to human health, resulting in, medical issues or illness.
For example
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,Korean ramen and fried chicken are most enjoyable for teenagers in
this
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period,which can link to the global increase in obesity, diabetes or other health issues, sometimes, leading to psychological distress.
Therefore
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, both families and societies will have a huge impact on unhealthiness compared to traditional
meal
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meals
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.
This
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makes it clear that
,
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apply
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consuming large
amount
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amounts
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of junk
food
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is bad for
body
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the body
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and mind.
Secondly
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, fast
food
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production and packaging contribute significantly to environmental degradation.
For instance
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,most of the packaging products from overseas are made out of plastic materials ,so
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this
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they
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can be properly
shiped
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shipped
shaped
to
another country
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other countries
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.
Hence
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, improper disposal of plastic waste can cause pollution to flora and fauna.
In contrast
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, traditional
food
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preparation methods may be more sustainable and eco-friendly.
This
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becomes apparent that international junk
food
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cause
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causes
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more harm than traditional
food
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. In conclusion,local
foods
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are more healthy and environmentally friendly than imported
foods
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and
also
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represent
history
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the history
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and culture of the country.Obviously,
this
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pre-packaging
food
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will always have greater negative effects than positive effects,
therefore
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, traditional
foods
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should not be replaced by international fast
foods
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and we should treasure home-cooked meals more often.
Submitted by tifjong on

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coherence cohesion
The essay attempts to maintain coherence with a basic structure, but it would benefit from clearer and more distinct paragraphing to enhance the logical flow. It is commendable that an introduction and conclusion are present; however, they could be strengthened with more precise thesis statements and summaries of the main points, respectively.
task achievement
Work on developing ideas more completely and ensure that all parts of the prompt are addressed. While the broader topic is engaged with, there's room to explore the impact on families and societies more fully. Offer more elaboration on the psychological and cultural significance of traditional foods. Enhance the response by including a wider range of relevant, specific examples to support your points convincingly.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • cultural identity
  • heritage
  • culinary practices
  • prevalent
  • obesity
  • diabetes
  • diet-related health issues
  • economic challenges
  • street food vendors
  • family dynamics
  • on-the-go
  • environmental degradation
  • sustainable
  • eco-friendly
  • homogenization
  • foodscapes
  • agricultural diversity
  • biodiversity
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