Some people believe that only the Government can bring about significant changes in society while others believe that even an individual can have a lot of influence on society. What is your opinion on the above statement?

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The line graph below shows electricity production in France between 1980 and 2012. In 1980 teats we compare electricity production in France there 4 kinds product  Thermal, Nuclear, Hydroelectric Renewables, here
compered
Correct your spelling
compared

The word compered doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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from 1980- 2010 and
need
Add the particle
need to

It appears that the verb find should be in the to-infinitive form. Consider adding the word to.

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find contrast. Thermal started your my product 120
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

terrawat
Correct your spelling
terawatt

If you don’t want terrawat to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

and
theb
Correct your spelling
the
then

If you don’t want theb to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

overtime it lowered step by step.
In
Change preposition
At

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

time nucklearn started your product
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
terrawat
Change the capitalization
Terrawat

If you don’t want terrawat to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

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75 by 1980
however
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

nucklear grew higher than others in 2005 nuclear was power ever. In 2005 nuclear was 485 it
did
Verb problem
was

There may be a verb use issue here.

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the most powerful.
In contrast
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

  renewables and Thermal. Renewables
in
Capitalize word
In

The word in should be capitalized in this context.

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1980 electricity production saw only a small it started 
0
Change preposition
at 0

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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terrawat
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

hours and
than
Replace the word
then

The word than may be used incorrectly. Review the following notes to determine the appropriate usage for your context.

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in 2012 years it
is
Unnecessary verb
apply

The verb is appears to be unnecessary here.

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  grew
25
Change preposition
by 25

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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terrawat
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

hours, nuclear and thermal in
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

time Thermal started
approximately
Change preposition
at approximately

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
75terrawat hours by 1980 but unfortunately in 2012 it lowered
60
Change preposition
by 60

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
terrawat
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

hydroelectric was goes at one pace.

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introduction conclusion present
The essay lacks a proper introduction and conclusion, which are essential components of a cohesive piece of writing. Make sure to include these in your essay to provide context and summarise your key points effectively.
logical structure
The essay does not maintain a logical structure throughout, making it difficult to follow. Ensure that your essay has a clear beginning, development, and conclusion to improve readability.
supported main points
The main points of the essay are not well-supported with detailed information or examples. Include specific data and examples to strengthen the argument and demonstrate a clear understanding of the topic.
complete response
The essay's response to the task is minimal, providing a limited picture of the electricity production in France. To fully meet the task's demand, expand your analysis and provide more in-depth information and interpretation of the data.
clear comprehensive ideas
The ideas presented in the essay are vaguely explained and need to be developed more clearly and comprehensively. Take time to elaborate on each type of electricity production and its trends over the years.
relevant specific examples
The essay lacks specific examples to support the discussion on the electricity production trends. Use figures and statistics from the graph to make your analysis more compelling and informative.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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