1. Freshwater is a limited resource in certain regions of the world. Today, the escalating demand has transformed it into a global problem. What are the causes of increasing demand? What measures can governments and individuals take to respond to the problem?
Water
resources protection has became
one of the most pressing Change the verb form
become
envrionmental issures
in Correct your spelling
environmental issues
increasingly
globalised world, especially freshwater. Add an article
an increasingly
the increasingly
This
essay will consider the causes of and suggest possible solutions to it.
Perhaps the biggest reason is the number of factories and industries increased dramatically which will directly cause the
Correct article usage
apply
environment
pollution, Replace the word
environmental
such
as rubbish, wastewater
discharged into the ocean.
It is conceivable that the consequences will be Correct word choice
and wastewater
seriously
. Replace the adverb
serious
For example
, a
large number of marine life Correct word choice
if a
died
, people's health will Wrong verb form
die
be
worse Unnecessary verb
apply
quicker
. What is more, with more vehicles Replace the word
quickly
come
out, the more carbon Wrong verb form
coming
emissons
will produced, which means that it will significantly affect air quality and Correct your spelling
emissions
thus
water
quality. There will be less and less drinking water
for people.
Turning to possible solutions, probably the most effective measure is the
government Change preposition
for the
need
to impose some policies to ban or hider these ways, increasing Verb problem
apply
evironment
protection activities regularly which all the companies will engaged in, holding some related Correct your spelling
environment
environmental
lecture
to let people know as much as possible about the disadvantages of harming the Fix the agreement mistake
lectures
environment
. It is also
necessary to rugulate
individuals' Correct your spelling
regulate
behavior
, Change the spelling
behaviour
do
not throw rubbish Unnecessary verb
apply
everywere
, raising Correct your spelling
everywhere
the
awareness of Correct article usage
apply
protect
Change the form of the verb
protecting
environment
, as they know the most Add an article
the environment
fundemental
harmful to their physical health from the poor Correct your spelling
fundamental
water
environment
, they will pay more attention to it.
To sum up
, the impact that caused water
pollution by factories, industries and the
vehicles is profound, Correct article usage
apply
which
requires the government's and our immediate attention and actions.There are ample solutions to Correct word choice
and
this
environmental concern.Submitted by xueyinggao2023 on
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Task Achievement
Your introduction briefly outlines the topic, but it fails to adequately paraphrase the question and does not clearly state the causes of increasing demand for freshwater or the measures that can be taken. It is important to clearly address these points to fulfill the task response criteria fully.
Coherence & Cohesion
The structure of your essay is noticeable, but the logical flow is somewhat erratic. Paragraphs should clearly relate to one another, each beginning with a topic sentence that previews the content of the paragraph. Ensure you use a range of cohesive devices to better link ideas and maintain coherence throughout your essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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