Some people believe that there should be fixed punishments for each type of crime. Others, however, argue that the circumtances of an individual crime, and the motivation for comitting it, should always be taken into account when deciding on the punishment. Disscus both these views and give your opinion
Some people think that every kind of
crime
should has
fixed Change the verb form
have
punishment
, but other
agree that must consider Fix the agreement mistake
others
about
other factors Change preposition
apply
such
as condition
and motivation Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
about
Change preposition
for
related
Add an article
a related
the related
crime
that Fix the agreement mistake
crimes
have
been done. In my opinion, both Change the verb form
has
of
views can be used Change preposition
apply
depends
on the situation and reason Wrong verb form
depending
such
as fixed punishment
in order
to give Correct article usage
a detterent
detterent
effect but Correct your spelling
deterrent
the
other hand we need to cross-check several aspects as consideration to give Change preposition
on the
punishment
.
On the one hand, every crime
have
to Change the verb form
has
has
Change the verb
have
fixed
Correct article usage
a fixed
punishment
in order
to make perpetrator
Correct article usage
the perpetrator
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
Correct article usage
a detterent
detterent
effect. If the regulation the government establish Correct your spelling
deterrent
the
permanent Correct article usage
apply
punishment
, it will raise a
folk's fear Correct article usage
apply
to do
Change preposition
of doing
crime
which have been forbidden. Moreover
, it can educate and appear
awareness Verb problem
raise
of
the public about the related Change preposition
among
crime
, why it is forbidden, what
the Correct word choice
and what
advantadges
and impact Correct your spelling
advantages
if
it is done. Add a missing verb
are if
For instance
, the case
of using illegal drugs have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
persistant
Correct your spelling
persistent
punishment
namely will be imprisoned for several years.
On the other hand
, there is a case
that required
special investigation, so we need to cross-check the factors that have been involved. It is caused by more Wrong verb form
requires
accident
that have been manipulated by Fix the agreement mistake
accidents
individual
and it makes the public confused about the real story Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
about
related cases. Change preposition
of
Moreover
, as rule
of law, every accident that Correct article usage
a rule
happen
in the country must follow defined process flow and structure regulation. So, we can decide whether Change the verb form
happens
they
guilty or not and what the appropriate Add a verb
they are
they were
punishement
Correct your spelling
punishment
.
Add a missing verb
is.
Forcreate
example, Correct your spelling
For
case
of Correct article usage
the case
mirna
Correct your spelling
miRNA
Mirna
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
story
complexity, so the all of people Correct article usage
a story
that
have been involved have to be investigated even Correct pronoun usage
who
further
.
In summary, sometimes we need to define the fixed punishment
for particular
Add an article
a particular
crime
in order
to make public perpetrator has Correct article usage
a detterent
detterent
effect, but in some cases that have complex Correct your spelling
deterrent
problems
we need to consider other factors Add a comma
problems,
such
motivation
and condition in Change preposition
as motivation
order
to cross-check the case
.Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that you have a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should have a clear central idea and subsequent sentences should expand on that idea.
task achievement
Develop your main points more fully with clear explanations and relevant examples. The essay currently lacks depth in the analysis of the viewpoints presented.
coherence cohesion
Work on grammatical accuracy and range. There are numerous grammatical errors that hinder the clarity of the arguments.
task achievement
Enhance your lexical resource by using a wider range of vocabulary appropriately and accurately. Some words are used incorrectly which can confuse the reader.
coherence cohesion
Organize your ideas better. Use paragraphs effectively, each one should deal with a single aspect of the argument, and use cohesive devices to link ideas within and between paragraphs.
task achievement
Control sentence length and structure to aid readability. Shorter, clearer sentences can often make a stronger impact than long, complex ones that are prone to errors.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite