Some people say that teenagers should work part-time and earn money. This way they will learn basic lessons about work and become more disciplined. Others argue that teenagers shouldn’t sacrifice their rest and after-school activities to work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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In our contemporary era, it has been debated whether someone is supposed to

work

Use synonyms

during the study. The majority of the society believe that it is good

practise

Correct your spelling

practice

show examples

receive

Fix the infinitive

to receive

show examples

some

knoledge

Correct your spelling

knowledge

and might

impove

Correct your spelling

improve

other

skiils

Correct your spelling

skills

while

Linking Words

others think that the time after school is a leisure time for

break

Fix the agreement mistake

breaks

show examples

and activities. To examine both ways of

understang

Correct your spelling

understanding

understand

this

Linking Words

essay will examine both

point

Change to a plural noun

points

show examples

of view and give my view. Some elementary skills

about

Change preposition

show examples

career planning

Change the verb form

are

show examples

of the essence. First and foremost, part-time

work

Use synonyms

teaches students

Add the particle

to be

show examples

more responsible and how they should behave in

job

Add an article

the job

a job

show examples

Moreover

Linking Words

studends

Correct your spelling

students

might be learned how they should

work

Use synonyms

, which aspects

Change the verb form

are

show examples

crucial in their job.

For instance

Linking Words

, they will know what certainly must be ready in a certain period of time.

In addition

Linking Words

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

communication skills play a key role

as a result

Linking Words

younsters

Correct your spelling

youngsters

learns

Correct subject-verb agreement

learn

show examples

to communicate with everyone.

For example

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

ability would help young

emloyees

Correct your spelling

employees

Verb problem

apply

show examples

assist guests or tourists especially, if they

will

Verb problem

apply

show examples

work

Use synonyms

tourism

Correct article usage

the tourism

show examples

sphere. Obviously,

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

communication skills teach

young

Correct article usage

the young

show examples

generation

Use synonyms

work

Fix the infinitive

to work

show examples

in tandem,

making

Wrong verb form

make

show examples

new friends and develop

network

Fix the agreement mistake

networks

show examples

Thus

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

aspect

influence

Change the verb form

influences

show examples

their future careers and plans.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, teenagers are under pressure at school because of different

taska

Correct your spelling

tasks

and exams.

This

Linking Words

aspect

make

Change the verb form

makes

show examples

youngers

Correct your spelling

youngsters

show examples

stressful

Replace the word

stressed

show examples

, and they should release

Linking Words

this negative feelings

Change the determiner

this negative feeling

these negative feelings

show examples

For instance

Linking Words

, teenagers can join

Change preposition

apply

show examples

different

cources

Correct your spelling

courses

sources

such

Linking Words

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

music,

sport

Fix the agreement mistake

sports

show examples

, painting, cooking so forth.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, some students plan to carry on their future education, and they want to go to tutorials to supply extra lessons.

To sum up

Linking Words

, both points of view have pros and cons

depend

Wrong verb form

depending

show examples

on some situations. I

formly

Correct your spelling

firmly

formally

formerly

agree that every student should decide whether they want to

work

Use synonyms

or not, and choose

Add an article

a more

the more

show examples

advantageous

option

Fix the agreement mistake

options

show examples

on the assumption of their willings and schedule.

abdurahimov03Sat Nov 25 2023

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introduction

Your introduction is unclear and your thesis statement requires refinement to set a clear direction for the essay. It is important that the introduction provides a clear background to the topic and clearly outlines the scope and direction of your discussion.

paragraph structure

Work on structuring your paragraphs more clearly, with a single main idea in each one, followed by supporting information and examples. A clear topic sentence should commence each paragraph, guiding the reader through your argument or discussion.

cohesion

Your essay has some logical sequencing, but at times the progression of ideas and points could be more clear and coherent. Try to relate all paragraphs to the central topic, ensuring each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next.

task response

Refer back to the question throughout the essay to ensure clear task achievement. Your essay should directly address the prompts provided, showing awareness of all aspects of the task.

example usage

Examples used should be relevant and specific. They need to be developed sufficiently to clarify your points. Where possible, include personal examples or observations to support your arguments.

conclusion

The conclusion should clearly summarize the main arguments presented in your essay, reflect on the content of the body paragraphs, and clearly state your own opinion. It should not introduce any new points.

language usage

Your use of language shows an attempt to provide a range of vocabulary and structures, but there are recurring errors that can cause misunderstanding. Pay attention to grammar, sentence structure, and punctuation. Practice writing sentences that are both complex and accurate.

spelling and word forms

Accurately spell key terms related to the essay topic, and make sure to use the correct form of words (e.g. 'knowledge' instead of 'knoledge', 'learns' instead of 'learned'). Consistently check for these types of errors during and after writing.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
40
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

302 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Part-time job
Financial literacy
Work ethic
Discipline
Job market
Academic performance
Extracurricular activities
Labor laws
Work-life balance
Skill development
Monetary independence
Career prospects
Time management
Peer pressure
Rest and recreation
Minimum wage
Skillset enhancement
Self-sufficiency
Personal growth
Adolescent development

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Some people say that teenagers should work part-time and earn money. This way they will learn basic lessons about work and become more disciplined. Others argue that teenagers shouldn’t sacrifice their rest and after-school activities to work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

A company has announced that it is wishes to build a large factory near your community. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this new influence on your country. Do you support or oppose the factory? Explain your position.

Nowadays more and more young people hold the important positions in the government. Some people think that it is a good thing，while others argue that it is not suitable. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Write a letter to company when you forget to return a car on time

Governments should spend time on railways rather than roads.To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Theoretical subjects (such as mathematic and philosophy) should no longer be taught in universities because most of university students choose practical subjects (such as accounting and economics).To what extent do you agree or disagree?