In some countries fast food restaurants and supermarket gives money to schools to promote their products. Do you think this is a positive or negative development

#countries #food #restaurants #supermarket #money #schools #products #development

It is common to see the growth in commercial advertisements of fast

food

chains and

supermarket

Fix the agreement mistake

supermarkets

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to be displayed at

schools

in some countries.

While

this

can be a clever way to promote the products,

this

kind of advertising, in my opinion, is unconstitutional and it will have negative impacts on the younger generation. On the one hand, fast

food

and

supermarket

promotions with the targeted audiences of

students

will have negative influences on their lifestyle and diet. One of the most prominent

point

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points

show examples

to discuss is that

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apply

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students

, especially young ones, love to eat junk foods and sweets.

Therefore

, many fast

food

restaurants and

supermarket

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supermarkets

show examples

will tend to commercialize unhealthy

food

such

as chocolate, french fries, hamburger and many more.

Hence

this

will increase the

students

' demand

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for

show examples

fast foods and junk foods, exposing them to many other crucial problems.

For instance

, increasing children's sugar and fat consumption can result in obesity and many other chronic diseases

such

as diabetes and high blood pressure.

On the other hand

this

is unconstitutional and illegal because

schools

can not use their learners as a way to produce income. Regarding the fact that

schools

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

money from those companies and expose children to a detrimental diet and lifestyle,

this

can be considered an act of corruption.

Therefore

, if

schools

were to make income by

commercialize

Wrong verb form

commercialising

show examples

their

students

, they had to at least verify the benefits and negative effects of what would be displayed.

As a result

schools

should only accept the deals of advertisements that can

benefits

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benefit

show examples

students

such

universities

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university

show examples

scholarships,

extra-curriculum

Correct your spelling

extracurricular

show examples

courses and education books. In conclusion, commercializing fast

food

and

supermarket

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supermarkets

show examples

within

schools

is happening in some countries. In fact, those advertisements are

inapproriate

Correct your spelling

inappropriate

and can lead to many other health problems which are, in my opinion, significant and detrimental.

Submitted by huynhlenguyen20052007 on Sun Nov 26 2023

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task achievement

Make sure to avoid generalizations and provide more focused examples specific to the context. For instance, mentioning an actual case study or research would strengthen the argument.

coherence cohesion

It's important to introduce more sophisticated connective words and phrases to ensure that the essay flows logically from one point to the next.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

302 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

sponsorship
commercialism
educational funding
brand loyalty
public health concerns
critical thinking
unhealthy eating habits
nutritional education
corporate influence
scholarships
educational resources
marketing strategies
ethical considerations
consumer habits
financial incentives
underfunded schools
health implications

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In some countries fast food restaurants and supermarket gives money to schools to promote their products. Do you think this is a positive or negative development

Some people think it would be better for large companies and industry to move to regional areas outside large urban centers. Do you think advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Leaders and directors in an organization are normally older people. Some people think younger leaders would be better. Do you agree or disagree?

In some countries there are more young people choosing to enrol in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

nowadays many people have access to computers on a wide basis and a large number of children play computer games. What are the negative impacts of playing computer games and what can be done to minimize the bad effects?

In many countries,there is a growing gap between the technical skills of younger people and those over the age of fifty. What problems does this cause, and what solutions could minimise the problems?