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Writing Samples
Band 4

In many countries, schools have started to include online learning as part of their curriculum. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?

#countries #schools #part #curriculum #trend
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Nowadays, more and more schools around the globe practice adding remote
classes
 to their regular timetables on a daily basis.
Although
students
 will be able to attend their
classes
 in a more flexible way, there are some drawbacks,
such
 as
an
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apply
show examples
increased screen
time
 and less face-to-face communication. In my opinion,
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the positives
show examples
positives
Change the noun form
positive
show examples
 sides of online learning do outweigh the disadvantages. The obvious argument in its favour is that online learning provides
students
 with greater flexibility in
time
. It means that they are free to choose
their
Change the pronoun
them
show examples
from
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apply
show examples
where, and at what
time
 to study.
For instance
, an online English school "Novakid" suggests a wide range of teachers from different
time
 zones, so their
students
 are able to schedule their
classes
 on preferable days and
time
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times
show examples
.
Also
, the advantage of online education is in a wider range of
classes
 children can choose from. Online
learnining
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learning
 provides access to
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 number of topics which may not be available locally.
On the other hand
, there are some drawbacks. Remote education undoubtedly leads to
lack
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a lack
show examples
 of social interaction between
students
. It limits the
time
of
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for
show examples
 real interaction, which is beneficial for
colloborative
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collaborative
 learning and social skills.
Also
, online learning increases screen
time
,
that
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which
show examples
 has
bad
Add an article
a bad
show examples
 influence on their physical activity and might cause
eyes
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eye
show examples
 strain.
To conclude
, despite certain negative sides of online learning, allowing
students
 with
such
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an opportinity
show examples
opportinity
Correct your spelling
opportunity
 is beneficial.
However
, the
time
 limit
students
 spend in front of their
sceens
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screens
scenes
 must be set by the parents to avoid any
psysical
Correct your spelling
physical
 issues.
Submitted by t-staro on

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task achievement
While your essay addresses the topic, consider developing each point further. Aim to provide a deeper analysis with multiple examples to substantiate your arguments. This will demonstrate a comprehensive grasp of the subject matter.
coherence cohesion
To improve coherence, ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and all subsequent sentences support that idea. Transitions between paragraphs could be smoother to enhance the logical flow. Additionally, check for varied sentence structures to improve readability and cohesion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • curriculum
  • flexibility
  • self-paced
  • collaborative learning
  • screen time
  • self-discipline
  • virtual classroom
  • digital literacy
  • time management
  • work-life-study balance
  • in-person interaction
  • cyber-slacking
What to do next:
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