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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The table below shows the numbers of visitors to Ashdown Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbished. The charts show the results of surveys asking visitors how satisfied they were with their visit, during the same to periods. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table below shows the numbers of visitors to Ashdown Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbished. The charts show the results of surveys asking visitors how satisfied they were with their visit, during the same to periods. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The table provides data on the number of
people
Use synonyms
 who visited a museum before and after its redesign,
while
Linking Words
 the pie charts illustrate the satisfaction of those visitors in both two periods through surveys.
Overall
Linking Words
, the total number of visitors who visited the historical site after finishing its work was more than that of went there before the refurbishment.
Also
Linking Words
 the number of individuals who
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 the highest satisfaction
rise
Correct subject-verb agreement
rises
show examples
 from before to after the work has been done.
According to
Linking Words
 the table, the population of visitors increased by 18,000
people
Use synonyms
 from 74,000 to 92,000. As
it
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
 clear from the pie charts, the portion of very satisfied
people
Use synonyms
 rose about 20% from before the redesigning work to after that and reached 35%.
In addition
Linking Words
, the percentage of
people
Use synonyms
 with lower satisfaction had a 10% growth from 30% to 40%. the share of
people
Use synonyms
 who were both highly dissatisfied and weakly dissatisfied experienced a noticeable decline from 10% to 5% and from 40% to 15%.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the constant 5% of
people
Use synonyms
 did not respond to the survey.
Submitted by z.rajabi on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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