The graph below gives information from a 2008 report about consumption of energy in the USA since 1980 with projections until 2030.

The graph below gives information from a 2008 report about consumption of

energy in the USA since 1980 with projections until 2030.
The given line graph indicates a report from 2008 in terms of the
figures
a consumption of six types of
energy
by fuel -
petrol
and
oil
, coal, natural
gas
, nuclear, solar and
wind
, and
hydropower
in the USA since 1980 with projections until 2030.
Overall
, the power of
petrol
and
oil
is the primary
energy
in the USA over
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a 50-years
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50-years
Correct your spelling
50-year
period. The second
consumptions
of
energy
are coal and natural
gas
. The less
consumptions
are nuclear, solar /
wind
, and
Hydropower
. All
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
type
Fix the agreement mistake
types
show examples
of
energy
both grow by 2023,
while
hydropower
slightly decline by 2023. In 1980, the main three types of
energy
-
petrol
and
oil
, coal, and natural
gas
are
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
consumed at approximately 35, 17, and 20 quadrillion respectively.
While
the remaining
energy
- nuclear, solar
and
Correct word choice
apply
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wind
, and
hydropower
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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all consumed about
at
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apply
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4 quadrillion. The
figures
of
Change preposition
for
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petrol
and
oil
and natural
gas
both fluctuated between 1980 and 1995. Meanwhile, the numbers of coal and nuclear rose gradually.
However
, the amounts of
consumptions
Fix the agreement mistake
consumption
show examples
of solar and
wind
and
hydropower
slightly decreased. After 1995, the
numers
Correct your spelling
numbers
number
of
petrol
, and coal both experienced a
dramatically
Change the adverb
dramatic
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growth.
While the
Correct word choice
The
show examples
figures
of
Change preposition
for
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nature
Replace the word
natural
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gas
fluctuate
Wrong verb form
fluctuated
show examples
before 2010, and
then
is
Verb problem
it was
show examples
stable.
In addition
, the
figures
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
nuclear
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
solar and
wind
increased gradually,
while
the numbers of consumption of
hydropower
declined. By 2023, the main
consumptions
of
energy
still are
petrol
and
oil
, coal, these stand
about
Change preposition
at about
show examples
41 and 28 quadrillion respectively.
Nevertheless
, the consumption of
hydropower
slightly
decease
Correct your spelling
decrease
show examples
by 2023.
Submitted by Nini on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 75%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words figures, energy, petrol, oil, gas, wind, hydropower, consumptions with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "numbers of" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "decline" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "fluctuated" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "gradually" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 3 times.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Energy consumption
  • Renewable resources
  • Non-renewable resources
  • Fossil fuels
  • Nuclear power
  • Hydroelectric power
  • Solar energy
  • Wind energy
  • Biomass
  • Consumption patterns
  • Technological advancements
  • Energy efficiency
  • Sustainable development
  • Carbon footprint
  • Energy policy
  • Projections
  • Decade
  • Significant shifts
  • Economic factors
  • Environmental impact
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