The maps below show the center of a small town called Islip as it is now, and plans for its development.

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The maps compare the present status of the centre area of the city Islip, which is a minuscule town, with its figures after future developments.

Overall

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, a dual carriageway will be established based on the development procedure in which a shopping centre, transportation station, and parking lot are surrounded by novel dual carriage roads

as well as

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new residential areas. The main road will be exclusively allocated to pedestrians and the park will be dwindled. The most outstanding roadway change will be the invention of the dual carriageway which links park and school paths on the southeast and southwest on the bottom half of the map.

Also

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, the countryside will be transplanted with the northern part of the carriageway. The main road is planned to be turned over to a pedestrian path. The newly constructed residential zone is accessible via the east road.

Additionally

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, many facilities will be implemented after the city centre is developed

such

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as a carpark and bus station on top of the pedestrian way

that is

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currently a part of the shopping region

that is

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along the countryside. A new housing region will be implemented on the left side of the park and the other one will be

at the end

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of the new eastern

Submitted by saba.yazdany18 on Sun Nov 26 2023

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "that is".

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.

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Vocabulary: The word "maps" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

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7
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
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Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

209 words

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The maps below show the center of a small town called Islip as it is now, and plans for its development.

Developing the economy will always damage the environment. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many people believe that the priority of the government should be to ensure growing economy. While others believe that the government should focus its effort on uplifting the less fortunate? discuss both views