Some people think that you can only learn about the cultures of different places by traveling there. Other people think that you can learn just as much about these places from reading books and watching travel documentaries about them. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There are some
prespective
Correct your spelling
perspective
that cultures of different
places
are learnt by travelling ,other's say that it can be learnt through reading
books
,watching travel documents and some through
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
.Let us discuss both the
prespective brifely
Correct your spelling
perspectives briefly
.
Firstly
, travelling to different
places
will teach you different types of lessons .
According to
the
places
and
people
Add a comma
people,
show examples
the traditions will change .If we visit
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
particular region we can get new
experience
Fix the agreement mistake
experiences
show examples
through the people living there ,the different climatic conditions that they are facing and
there
Replace the word
their
show examples
tradition
Fix the agreement mistake
traditions
show examples
.
Interacting
Change preposition
By interacting
show examples
with locals we can
know
Verb problem
learn
show examples
about their daily lives .
Attenting
Correct your spelling
Attending
their traditional festival and tasting their traditional food can give more joy .
While
visiting their own place
for example
, if we are visiting Jammu and Kashmir in the month of November to March we can see the
snow fall
Correct your spelling
snowfall
show examples
, snow
coverd
Correct your spelling
covered
villages and the mountains are filled with snow
form
Correct your spelling
from
show examples
this
we can
experiance
Correct your spelling
experience
the winter and how the people are
surving
Correct your spelling
surviving
serving
at these times .So travelling to different
places
can get more experience .
Secondly
,
while
we are learning through
books
and
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
, we can save time
comparing
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
to travelling to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
places
for weeks and months . Now
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
easier to study
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
different
tradition
Fix the agreement mistake
traditions
show examples
through
Add an article
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
.So
while
staying
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
home we can get
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
enough information about
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
different cultures.
it
Capitalize word
It
show examples
can make our lives easy . the information provided through
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
,reading
books
and watching travel documents can access more data easily .
Finally
, I conclude that learning
different
Change preposition
about different
show examples
cultures by travelling can give you more experience and provide adventure to life . At the same time ,
while
studying through
books
and
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
can get different and interesting information that will be
usefull
Correct your spelling
useful
.
Submitted by insighttribez on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction & Conclusion
Ensure you have a clear introduction and conclusion that summarizes your discussions and thesis statement. Both seemed somewhat repetitive and did not clearly establish your position or summarize your essay's key points.
Logical Structure
Improve the logical sequencing of ideas by adding connective words and using paragraphs effectively. Each paragraph should begin with a clear topic sentence and develop one main idea.
Developing Main Points
Support your main points with more detailed examples and explanations to strengthen your arguments and provide a richer understanding of the subject matter.
Task Response
Make sure to answer all parts of the prompt thoroughly. Introduce the argument, discuss both views, and then clearly state your own opinion.
Developing Ideas
While your ideas are related to the topic, you need to develop them more fully, ensuring the assertions are substantiated and the reader is not left wanting more information.
Sentence & Vocabulary Variety
To better captivate and inform the reader, use a variety of sentence structures and vocabulary. This will not only maintain their interest but also demonstrate your linguistic range.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: