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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The table and the bar chart give information about travelling to work in Houston, Texas

The table and the bar chart give information about travelling to work in Houston, Texas
The table and the bar chart give information about how
people
Use synonyms
 travel to
work
Use synonyms
 in Houston, Texas. The table illustrates the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
Use synonyms
travelers
Change the spelling
travellers
show examples
 per form of
transport
Use synonyms
 and how old
Use synonyms
travelers
Change the spelling
travellers
show examples
 of each type of
transport
Use synonyms
.
Linking Words
While the
Correct word choice
The
show examples
 bar chart compares the number of CO2 emissions from different forms of
transport
Use synonyms
 that they choose. General overview, most
people
Use synonyms
 use private cars for commuting to
work
Use synonyms
,
this
Linking Words
 is the main cause of CO2 emission.
Instead
Linking Words
 of going to
work
Use synonyms
 by bicycle or on foot is the best for the
environment
Use synonyms
, the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
Use synonyms
travelers
Change the spelling
travellers
show examples
 is the smallest. As can be seen from the table,
people
Use synonyms
 who use private cars have the highest
percentage
Use synonyms
 at around 48
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
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 and the average age is 43 years old.
While
Linking Words
Use synonyms
travelers
Change the spelling
travellers
show examples
 commute to
work
Use synonyms
 by bicycle or on foot is the lowest
percentage
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 - just only 4
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 and the average age is youngest - 39 years old.
By comparison
Linking Words
, a car without passengers is the form of
transport
Use synonyms
 which
people
Use synonyms
 in Houston choose the most.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, with regard to the bar chart about CO2 emissions from different forms of
transport
Use synonyms
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cars without passengers release the highest quantity of CO2 to the
environment
Use synonyms
 with more than 0.32
kilogram
Fix the agreement mistake
kilograms
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 per person per
kilometer
Change the spelling
kilometre
show examples
.
This
Linking Words
 number is more than 4 times the number of
people
Use synonyms
 who share a car with 0.08
kilogram
Fix the agreement mistake
kilograms
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 per person per
kilometer
Change the spelling
kilometre
show examples
. Almost no effect on the
environment
Use synonyms
, using bicycles, going on foot or using public
transport
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 does not release or release the least CO2 to the
environment
Use synonyms
.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 88%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people, work, percentage, travelers, transport, co, environment with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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