IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Computers are being used more and more in education and so there will soon be no role for the teacher in education. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Over the
last
Linking Words
 two or three decades, technology has developed drastically, especially
Use synonyms
education
Change preposition
in education
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.
Computers
Use synonyms
 play a crucial role in
education
Use synonyms
 at present and
the
Change the word
their
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 usage
are
Change the verb form
is
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increased
Wrong verb form
increasing
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,
therefore
Linking Words
, in the future, teachers will not be needed to teach. I strongly disagree with
this
Linking Words
 statement for the following reasons.
To begin
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 with, the
professors
Change to a genitive case
professor's
professors'
show examples
 work will be not existed by
Computers
Use synonyms
 because
computers
Use synonyms
 are set by the programs, it only delivers what
already
Add a missing verb
is already
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 set. The
teachers
Change to a genitive case
teacher's
teachers'
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 role is not set by some programs, they have
own
Correct pronoun usage
their own
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 sense to analyse and teach
to
Change preposition
apply
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students clearly without
getting
Verb problem
making
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 any
mistake
Fix the agreement mistake
mistakes
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.
For example
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,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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professor jobs are more
demanded
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in demand
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 in
job
Add an article
the job
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 market
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
around the world because they
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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only teach students properly.
Hence
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,
computers
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 will not
be dominated
Wrong verb form
dominate
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 the
lectures
Change the noun form
lecture
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 jobs in future.
Furthermore
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, when a person
teach
Change the verb form
teaches
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 in the educational
institutional
Replace the word
institution
show examples
Linking Words
while
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
students can ask any doubts about
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their subject and they get a clear explanation from their trainers but it
does
Verb problem
is
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 not possible when
computers
Use synonyms
 teach.
For instance
Linking Words
,
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
manpower should be needed for setting programs about
Add an article
the course
a course
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course
Fix the agreement mistake
courses
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 in
Use synonyms
education
Add an article
the education
show examples
 field, without manpower nothing is possible. Traditional
method
Fix the agreement mistake
methods
show examples
 of teaching
must
Verb problem
are
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need
Wrong verb form
needed
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 for
student's
Change noun form
students'
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life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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 in order to
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
enhance their career and knowledge
through
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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this
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.
To conclude
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, more and more usage of
computer
Fix the agreement mistake
computers
show examples
 means it will not dominate the teacher's role and job in the future. The
trainers
Change to a genitive case
trainer's
trainers'
show examples
 work is
a
Change the article
apply
show examples
significant
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the
education
Use synonyms
sectors
Fix the agreement mistake
sector
show examples
.
Therefore
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, I strongly disagree with
this
Linking Words
 statement in the above-mentioned details and I hope
this
Linking Words
 trend drives more benefits to the learners.

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task achievement
As an IELTS examiner, it is evident that while you have formed a clear position in response to the prompt, the response requires further development to fully satisfy the task requirements. More specific examples and a richer diversity of sentence structures are needed to support your assertions effectively. To enhance your score, ensure that each paragraph contains a clear main idea, supported by detailed examples or explanations.
coherence cohesion
You've made some effort to organize your ideas logically, but the essay lacks clear topic sentences at times, leading to a diminished sense of coherence. To improve, begin each paragraph with a topic sentence that clearly defines the main idea. Further, you should work on ensuring logical flow between sentences and paragraphs, which can be aided by the effective use of cohesive devices (such as conjunctions, pronouns, and synonyms). Practice varying sentence structures to make your writing more dynamic and engaging.
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